It's been a rough recovery. I just had gastric sleeve surgery Nov.19th. I was in the hospital for three nights and four days. I left on thanksgiving day. I'm still on a liquid diet until the 11th and then I get to start eating pureed food. Right now I'm still in pain. I think I did stuff too soon and too fast. I think I have a bruised rib. but I'm not too sure. If the pain doesn't let up soon then I'll be going to the ER. Post op depression is not cool. I don't understand why I'm depressed. The decision to have surgery was to better my life. I'm not doing it for anyone but for me and I know it's not a fix all. I just wasn't expecting this. I see my psychiatrist on the 19th. I've had to stop taking some of my medications because of the surgery, but the dr's were all aware of it. I don't know what to do. I just know that 90% of the time I'm miserable and in pain.
I'm 16lbs down, which is great! I'm excited to see how much weight I can shed. and to see how much better to be feeling hopefully sooner than later.
Please be sending me prayers and positive vibes.
As I have pondered the results of my recent "Testing" post, the term, "Gaslighting" has been floating through the ponderations like a street sign. When I finally started taking my amnesia therapy seriously in the mid to late 80's, the term was used extensively to help me explore what was going on with my memory dysfunctions and resulting psychoses (pl). I was self-gaslighting like a toxic mother...
I have to work with a lot of priveledged, snobby people. I feel like I would rather die than serve them. It is nearly impossible for me to find of job, due to me current situation. So, I know I "should" stick it out. However, ethically, I don't know that I can. Suicide honestly seems to outweigh serving those monsters.