Hi guys! just need to have a bit of a vent. Found out today that one of my work mates is pregnant, shes going for her first scan 2morro, and I couldnt be more green with envy if I tried. I have had to force a smile all day while all the time I was thinking 'that will never be me' and feeling crap and jealous. Me and this girl have always got on really well, honestly shes lovely and I knew shes been ttc since she got married in october, and I am really happy for her, but at the same time, I feel empty right down to the pit of my stomach. I just keep thinking well whats so special about her that she can have kids so quickly? what is she doing that I'm not? and to be honest I just feel hollow, like I'm not a real person, I cant even do the primal most human thing in the world, honestly I just feel like I dont deserve to be here. I know that sounds self pitying but thats how I feel. Its a horrible way to think and feel, and I really need some support and guidance from you guys xxx
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