I was in a very abusive relationship, and he not only hurt me, but allowed his friends to have "fun" with me too. I thank God that I was able to get out of the relationship before he killed me. I have been out of that situation for a few years now, and decided to pick myself up and try to move on. I decided to go back to school (which was a huge, hard decision for me to make). I was accepted at a private religous university. I thought that this was going to be what I needed in my life. However, after a few semesters the Dean of the University found out about my previous past of abuse and rape, and kicked me out of school because I had sex outside of marriage, and I used self Injury as a coping mechanism. He said I was a threat to myself and the community. I tried protesting saying that I didnt ask or willingly participate in what my boyfriend did to me, but I was robbed of that right. And as far as my self injury went, nobody knew about it. I didnt tell a soul or show anybody it. It was a way of dealing with the hell that I went through. It didnt matter to the dean though. I am so frustrated, because my therapist tells me that there was nothing I could have done, it happened - he chose to beat me, but a University of God is telling me that I allowed it to happen. I dont really understand why I am in trouble, and I question all the time if I really tried to put up a good fight. I live with the fear, the flashbacks, the nightmares everyday, its hard to just get out of bed in the morning, so I cant figure out why I am being punished for something I really had no control over.
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