I need some advice. I have recently moved here about a year and a few months ago. I sold all my belongings and left all my family behind, got an apartment here where i reside now with my two children 8 & 10. I am now back with their father whom i started a relationship 13 years ago. Before i moved here him and i weren't together , he had went away for 5 years and when he was back we talked into getting back together. We have gone through everything together. From verbal abuse to physical abuse, been cheated on and we also have endured the lost of our 3 week old son new years day of 2001. Today he has changed a lot, he is no longer abusive , nor he physically abuses me. I think we have an good relationship, compared to how it was years ago i'd say is a lot better. Before i moved here i was weighing 98 lbs i was smoking weed everyday and barely ate. I finally quit smoking weed and cigarretts and eating healthier, and so i started gaining weight. I always had a low self esteem due to how i looked and felt about myself. And today i am weighing 130 lbs at 5'4. I feel good about myself, i can wear things i didnt wear back then, for example, short sleeve shirts, i always thought my arms were too skinny and it didnt look right so i was pretty much covered up all of the time , even summer time. I don't show cleavage, not because i'm unhappy with my breast, i think they never looked this good, :) but because is who i am, my jeans now are thight on me, not excesssively thight . But they look good on me, so the only thight thing on my body are my jeans. I can wear nice tops to go with my jenas and shoes, boots etc and im happy. But he says things about me that really hurt, i have tried explaining to him that most of my jeans i had when i was skinny and that now that i have gained some weight they are thight on me. I am however, able to zip 'em up so they cant be that thight. He tells me that i am going to make him get into a fight some day and he is going to end up in jail because other guys look at me, he says they are so thight im going to start a forest fire, whatever that means, he says that i dress like a whore and slutty. My kids have even told me he tells them i dress to thight and that is like i'm in the market. that i do it to draw attention to guys because i feel bad about myself, as i explained to you i feel GREAT about myself today. So that is untrue, i think he is scared, for a reason or another and the truth is he shouldn't be. I am his and i dont crave for no one elses attention. i feel great about myself and i feel that as long as i know how to carry myself theres no problem as to how thight my jeans/slacks are on me. Please tell me am i making sense or should i stop dressing this way because of his insecurities? Oh ! Before i moved here we spoke about my weight and he said he was going to help me look good and get right , he also added that i would get a lot of attention because i was beautiful and mention that i would have to know how to handle myself when other men approached me or tried talking to me. My answered to him was no need to worry , i am yours and you are all i want and need. Yet he now feels like this and i dont know what to do. Please help me figure this out. Thanks a lot !!!
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