As you all have read in my previous posts I was in somewhat of denial that I have been being emotionally abused for the past 5 yrs. After reading the website somebody suggested yesterday, youarenotcrazy.com I have no choice but to break the denial and realize I walked into one of the most craziest families and their circle of abuse with one another, how could they not be abusive to me, especially him? He has so many of the signs. Plays it out perfect for everyone else and treated me like he stepped on me and I was stuck to the bottom of his shoe. I can see how he was always trying to impress people outside of us especially with his money. He gets people first class seats with his sky miles, always buys lunch or dinner, gives expensive gift cards to people he works with, would offer to drive his co workers who live in the state next to us home if their plane was delayed or cancelled. I didn't get to experience that part of him. I got kicked out on a daily basis, told I had x amount of time to get out. Then I would try and leave, no stay, no go, no stay, when that stopped upsetting me, he started denying me sex, once I stopped begging for that & didn't get upset about being thrown out and started getting on my feet it was the he is moving out thing. Well, that worked for about 2 weeks and I then said yeah, you need to go, then he started with the not answering or returning my phone calls, which incidentally is the reason he says he has to leave now. That and he has to break the cycle. It has been 3 weeks and he still has yet to get his things and his mail. He says he is out of town and will when he gets back. He had the chance last week when he was in town to get his things and he didn't. He has tried to contact me twice so far this week and I have not returned any emails or texts to him. This is the first time in 5 years I have not acknowledged him in some way when he has tryed to contact me. I am finally standing my ground and it is because I read the posts on here and research on abuse and I think back over things he has said and done and I can't even imagine giving him the smallest chance to blame me for something or to talk down to me, or to just give me that darting glare of his. But I also know the lease is in his name and he can if he wants to just come back. I have been praying that he doesn't. Ugh, I hate going through this, especially since I went through this with my ex husband of 20 yrs. I hate all of the confusion and pain and everything that is involved in this.
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