I am filled with such anger, such RAGE. My peice of shit husband. I'm not sure if all this anger is healthy. Maybe it's just a stage I have to go through, like the stages of grief, of which I am quite familiar. He abused me emotionally for 3 years, got me arrested for murder 2 years ago, probably caused the miscarriage I had in November 2006, has gotten physical a couple times though nothing really serious, cheated on me our whole marriage, cheated on me while I was pregnant, wasn't there for the birth of our son, didn't spend hardly any time with him after he was born, has gotten 2 other women pregant, one before he ever asked me for a divorce, hasn't sent me child support in over a month, goes through jobs like he goes through toilet paper, tries to make ME feel like shit because he doesn't have his son, like it's ALL on me because I decided to leave, and is STILL only thinking of himself. I AM SO FUCKING ANGRY. For a while I was sad, because I just wanted everything to be okay, to be right, to be the way it was SUPPOSED to be for two people who loved each other. I'm still battling depression, but here lately I've been so damn ANGRY at him. It pisses me off when I think of all he's put me through, and then he has the audacity to blame ME for him not having his son! I can't believe he has the fucking BALLS to tell me some shit like that! Is he truly that selfish? He told me once, that he "wasn't THAT bad". I had to correct him. Have you ever had someone make you cry EVERY SINGLE DAY? Literally EVERY day? He did. He made me cry for one thing or another, every...fucking...day. I am not exagerrating in the least. I just want him to die. That's the best thing he could do for this world, for his son, just die. Am I wrong to feel that way? Am I a bad person because I feel that way? He is the biggest mistake I've ever made; but, I really can't say that, because my son is not a mistake, and I don't regret sticking around so I could have him. Anyone else feel the way I do?
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