
Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.

deleted_user
I met a woman a little over a year ago online. We started dating shortly after that and things were going good. After learning more about her I found out she was wanted on warrants in another state. She had been living in downtown Minneapolis on the streets and also was heavily involved in drugs. In January of 2006 she had basically escaped that area and moved back to Wisconsin while her then boyfriend was locked up, this is when I met her. After he was released he moved to Wisconsin to keep tabs on her. He beat her, he verbally abused her and he kept her drugged up on heroin and crack cocaine so he could manipulate her. I later found out he was also forcing her to commit the crimes that got her the warrants as well as many other legal issues and a rap sheet several pages long. In May of 2006 he had to go spend a week in jail and I managed to talk her into moving in with me which she did. Everything was going great and he couldn't find her right away. Eventually he did find her and managed to get into her head once again by threat of death to her and her family. During this time she got hooked back on drugs, stole my car once, pawned everything she had of value and started with things that belonged to me that I wouldn't notice and would also disappear for days and sometimes weeks at a time saying she was with her girlfriends. To make a long story a little bit shorter I have spent thousands of dollars on lawyers and legal expenses trying to help her get all of this taken care so she can lead a normal life like she says she wants. She totalled out one car while she was seeing the (ex) boyfriend. I had to spend a night in jail for her because she tried to outrun the police with my truck and me in it. To top it all off she cheated on me with the supposedly ex-boyfriend after I proposed to her and gave her an engagement ring for Christmas. Currently she is sitting in an adult detention center and has to appear in two other counties on probation violation holds. She has been locked up since 1/4/07 and probably will not be out until March or April of this year, possibly longer. My first question is this, why does she continue running back to that type of relationship? Second, is there something wrong with me for continually trying to help this person? I am having some serious issues forgiving the cheating portion of this. She continues to tell me she is done with all of it now and will do anything to show that to me. Do I trust her this time? She has made this same claim before but ended up going back. She does suffer from Bi-Polar, depression and very low self esteem could this have something to do with it? The medication she was on when I first met her was Prozac and Riddelin but that has since changed to Paxil and Depacote which seems to helping a lot more since she is now taking it being locked up. Do I give her the one more chance that she is asking for?
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You really sound like a great guy and I feel for you in your situation. If you ask me it sounds like you have given her far too many chances already. You have to understand that people with Bipolar enjoy risk taking and she probablly gets a high off of being with someone who she knows is a bad person and she gets a high off of doing bad things like doing drugs or running from the cops. The only reason she is taking the drugs (paxil, Depakote) is because they are giving them to her for free she doesn't need to pay anything for them. People with BiPolar exhibit reckless behaviors like cheating on you and weather or not he's feeding her drugs and threatening to kill her she still has a choice. While she is in jail of course she is going to say how she is going to change they all say that, when she gets out she'll go straight back to her old behaviors. Do yourself a favor and while she's locked up don't go see her, you have been enableing her. (By her being able to steal from you to use the moey for drugs) Let her sit in jail and really think about what she has done. You don't steal from someone who is trying to help you out. So let her sit in jail alone to think about everything she has done to you, and meanwhile you go out and find someone who deserves your loyality. She is manipulating you.