I'm having counseling at the moment and we have been talking about past experiences.Especially about how my Dad was when he was dunk. Now I can't stop thinking about two horrible episodes when he battered my Mam. Its horrible, it just keeps going through my head . He pulled her all round the room by her hair, and i could hear him him punching her, he hit her so hard. I was frozen to the spot, i couldn't move and do anything. I wish i had tried. I feel so guilty, maybe just my appearance would have stooped him. After he stopped I went mad and smashed up my bedroom. He came in and slapped me all over. I just curled in a ball. I don't even care what he did to me, that was nothing. I just have these horrible memories which feel so hurtful. How do i stop thinking about them, or at least try and get on with my life. I'm supposed to be meeting my friend tonight. I'm hoping that I don't get drunk as i have stopped. I really want to keep doing well.
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My backstory and reasons for depression are on my profile.I feel as though I keep so busy so I don't have to think about any of this. I haven't been happy in my current city for a long time, and I sit and research another city to move to, because it's so much cheaper. I also try to take weekend trips to escape, because I'm just over it all. I also hate that everywhere I look, there are memories...