So I am only 19 years old and I am just now starting to deal with me being abused for 16 years. And now that I have started to deal with it all I started to realize I am pushing away all the good people who love me away. I feel myself getting depressed. I feel myself losing control of my emotions and my actions. I have held it in for 3 long years and acted like it was no big deal but now I feel it spilling out of my pores and that anger is the only thing that makes it go away. And I feel myself lashing out. Saying mean and hurtful things to people who dont deserve it. But how do I talk about it to someone whose never gonna understand. And as far as relationships go well I am just screwed at that. Every guy I tell I was abused to, dont want to stick around with someone who has baggage. I mean I dont blame them but I wish for once someone who would love me for me and understand what I am going through and that its never easy pretending everything is okay.
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