Today is day 10 and I will make it through without contacting my ex boyfriend. I miss him dearly but I know it will only make things worse for me to talk to him, or even see him. It is almost 8 weeks since I last saw him. I saw him in the morning and by the afternoon I told him I never wanted to see him again. I have gotten two emails from him, business related I guess. I set a goal that no matter what situation comes up I will take care of it myself and if I can't it will have to wait until Dec 29th. I am still confused about his abuse. He was so hateful and told me once he is gone, he is gone. His emails are really not anything I need to be concerned with, it was just a reason to contact me. I have never gone this long without initiating contact or responding to his. I am trying to get my focus back on me. It is so hard though. I felt so bad about myself and still do, I still think it is my fault. He would say mean things to me all of the time. He kicked me out on a daily basis and when I would say fine I am leaving, he would tell me why I can't leave, that I needed to stay. My livelyhood was a game to him and still is. He would say he can't wait until he never has to see me again or talk to me again. Those things really hurt. Still do. So all of you trying to not contact your ex, I know what you are going through. It is tough, just take it one day at a time.
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