
Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.

deleted_user
I guess I am extremely confused and not sure where to turn. I've never done anything like this before, so am a little new to the whole process. I have a history of sexual abuse myself and have been involved in a relationship for about 3 years now. This is the first "healthy" relationship I had ever been involved in and he swept me off of my feet. We were engaged within a year and half and then moved in together. However, after moving in together he totally changed and I am not sure how to deal with this. He has become extremely controlling of everything I do, especially spending time with friends and family. He doesn't want me to work, but then gets angry that I don't have any money. I am a college student and he knows how important my education is to me, however, he consistently asks me to skip classes to spend time with him and does not want me to go on for my master's degree. He has locked me in rooms and our confrontations have turned physical in the past. I think that the main thing that I am struggling with is that I love him and he is the first man that ever really loved me. I guess I am just really confused and not sure if I should be ending this relationship. I know that I am scared of him right now because he calls me up to 20 times a day and shows up where he knows I will be, almost like he is trying to intimidate me. However, I also know that if I just went home he would trust me again and stop following me everywhere. Any advice would be great.
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Locking you in a room is a criminal act. So is hitting you. People who love each other do not do this to each other. Get yourself some good support, friend, sister, Mum or someone else you trust and hang on because he is going to do all he can to keep control over you. Do not let him!
I know how you feel, when you say he is the first man to really love you. I was molested as a child and I also had a mean, neglectful, abusive mother. This resulted in me having no self esteem and the first guy that really cared for me deeply, I thought, was all I needed. But, I have to say, people that come from abuse usually attract abusive people. Sometimes, you can't see the signs that they are, because when you come from abuse, you are use to it and abusive people thus seem like the norm.
You should get out of this relationship right away, and seek individual counselling to get some self esteem to help you attract people with self esteem also. Cause this guy has none.
Good luck.
Do you have Womans Aid where you are?if so give them a ring & they will put you in a safe place until you can sort yourself out.
I done counceling for them in my country for a while & have helped many people in the same situation as you & the ones that took my advice have moved on.Some of them still keep in touch with me.So good luck & i hope you take my advice & get out now before it's too late.Keep in Touch as i'm here for you if you need me.One more thing is Love Yourself First,thats the motto of womans aid.Big Hugs from Ellenxx