I mean choked not chocked. lol

i used to give up really easy. i can only pray that if i am ever in the situation again i will fight back.

This is going to sound odd but it depends on who it is. More than not I fight back.

hm I always seemed to fight back. I think that made it confusing for me because whenever he said it was my fault he hurt me so bad it was easier to swallow. I still feel insecure that if I hadn't of reacted he might not have got that bad.

YOU GET THE HELL OUT OF THAT SITUATION!! YOU SHOULDNT HAVE TO PICK BETWEEN THOSE KINDS OF OPTIONS!!!

It's so hard to say cause an irrational person that could change from moment to moment you don't know they could get more angry if you fight back...God, if you can walk out of this you must get the strength to do so...It always ends badly and only gets worse and pretty much if you want to survive this you have to leave...please write me if you want to talk and get more advice.

OK, so the question here is what do you do when a stronger man hits and abuses you? YOU LEAVE. Thats what you do, you leave. No matter what you do you will get beaten. Doesn't really matter if you fight back or not, doesn't matter how numb you get, doesn't matter if its choice between getting slapped or getting chocked. Sometimes i did fight back, sometimes i didn't. What difference did it make? None. It didn't stop until i left.

Sweetie, grab your kids, grab your clothes and run for your life. GET THE HELL OUT OF THAT HOUSE. Right now. Don't think you have the strength to do that? Then take a good look, and i mean a *good look* at your kids. I bet you love them like you can't believe. OK, now think about what they are learning about what a relationship looks like from the two of you. Did that change your mind? I sure hope so.

Don't worry about having the faith in yourself do to this, you will find it. If it helps, WE have faith in you.

I have left him a year ago! This is not my fault! My restraing order has ended. And am in process of getting a new one. We still have children together and a business to discuss from time to time. It doesn't take anything for him to get violent.
I can't handle this anymore!

That's great that you left...It has to be so hard to have to deal with him because he's the father...Maybe if you have to meet with him to discuss stuff have someone with you and meet in a public place? Whatever it takes so he doesn't hurt you anymore...hope he doesn't hurt the kids...maybe the court can order him to get mandatory counseling? Maybe because he's a monster there shouldn't be any contact what so ever? you don't deserve this...your kids don't want mommy to be hurt...I hope everything works out.

He doesn't physically abuse me, its emotional and verbal. I didn't used to fight back, but now I tell him what I think. Not that it helps, it makes him more mad and keeps him going. But I am so angry at being treated this way I can't keep it bottled up anymore.

JenniferG,
I wouldn't even know where to start to fight back from verbal or emotional abuse. I was in an emotionally abusive marriage and never fought back. It is not in my nature to verbally demean or emotionally abuse anyone and I refuse to stoop to that level. Fortunately, I am out of the abusive environment and have rediscovered the old me ... and I LIKE me.

I agree with nadel, get out!

Honey i am sorry that i got the impression that you were still in your abusive relationship, but read your post again. You talk about it all in the present tense. Like it just happened last night. Is that what is happening in your mind? Are you having flashbacks to your abusive relationship? I had them too, if you are. And they are just as real as when it happened. The panic, the fear, even to the point of the pain.

No he slapped and shook me the yesterday.

We still have to see each other. one day he busted through front door. Another he broke my window.