Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
How can I explain to him I really feel? How truly messed up my ex-husband made me? I tried not to let it affect my relationship with Jim but sadly it seems to be. I hate when he (Jim) lectures me on being a Minister and that I need counseling to get past my issues in order for me or the Ministry to help someone. DONT HE REALIZE I ALREADY KNOW ALL THIS!?
Of course not, why should he think I have a brain of my own when no other guy has before? Now he wants to close the Ministry until I deal with my issues? Well my friends, he knew I had issues before we even opened it! How dare he lay this on me. Its not my fault some guy a few cans short of a six pack messed with my head so badly.
What bothers me is that everyone is so focused on everything I do wrong, my alleged poor attitude, that they are blind to all the good I actually do. Hes trying to tell me that M and M2 are my friends...oh yea? Wouldnt know it from my end. Do they call to talk to me? No. They call to talk to him. HIM HIM HIM. Bite me. Must be nice to have friends in the real world.
Right now I am really hating my ex husband, and damn I wish he would call to apologize for everything he did to my family and me. But I know that deep in my heart it will never happen. That my issues, and my fears from him and his abuse is messing with the relationship I have now. Makes me feel like crap. And for Jim to close the doors to the Ministry, which has been our dream since practically the first day we met, fills me with despair.
We could be in the middle of dinner, doing something, or a conversation and the minute M calls, he ditches dinner, what were doing, or the conversation to talk to her for sometimes 3 hours. But yet Im just supposed to take it? Im sorry but I feel thats rude. I understand shes being abused, my heart goes out to her truly it does, but when you allow that friendship to interfere with your love relationship Im sorry but its wrong.
But Im just supposed to sit back and let it be. I know damn well if it were me counseling a man he would have heart failure and there would be hell to pay but thats ok.
Its so strange how I can be open to everyone on the internet but not with him. I dont feel comfortable telling him my problems and how I feel. Probably as I just told him before which ended up with him going downstairs to sleep (ah yes the wonderful guilt trip), because he is too close to me and I felt he wouldnt give me an accurate opinion.
If you cant talk to me without the pain and anger, Guiding Angels Ministries will close its doors. What the hell kind of shit is that? Be civil??? I thought I was being civil.
Yesterday we were fine, today hes sitting on his lofty throne and Im sitting here feeling like crap? What does he get out of all this?
Rolls eyes Its not what you say its how you say it he is soooo fond of telling me. Hey listen pal, I am sarcastic by nature and anyone who really knows me knows that they also know that its harmlessyou meant to tell me after a year you dont? Gods spare me!
Honestly my friends, the way I am feeling right now, if Guiding Angels Ministries closed..fine, if he left, fine.I know I am not the washed up miserable old hag with a chip on my shoulder he and his little Minister friend think I am, and in the end, isnt that what matters? What do you think?
Of course not, why should he think I have a brain of my own when no other guy has before? Now he wants to close the Ministry until I deal with my issues? Well my friends, he knew I had issues before we even opened it! How dare he lay this on me. Its not my fault some guy a few cans short of a six pack messed with my head so badly.
What bothers me is that everyone is so focused on everything I do wrong, my alleged poor attitude, that they are blind to all the good I actually do. Hes trying to tell me that M and M2 are my friends...oh yea? Wouldnt know it from my end. Do they call to talk to me? No. They call to talk to him. HIM HIM HIM. Bite me. Must be nice to have friends in the real world.
Right now I am really hating my ex husband, and damn I wish he would call to apologize for everything he did to my family and me. But I know that deep in my heart it will never happen. That my issues, and my fears from him and his abuse is messing with the relationship I have now. Makes me feel like crap. And for Jim to close the doors to the Ministry, which has been our dream since practically the first day we met, fills me with despair.
We could be in the middle of dinner, doing something, or a conversation and the minute M calls, he ditches dinner, what were doing, or the conversation to talk to her for sometimes 3 hours. But yet Im just supposed to take it? Im sorry but I feel thats rude. I understand shes being abused, my heart goes out to her truly it does, but when you allow that friendship to interfere with your love relationship Im sorry but its wrong.
But Im just supposed to sit back and let it be. I know damn well if it were me counseling a man he would have heart failure and there would be hell to pay but thats ok.
Its so strange how I can be open to everyone on the internet but not with him. I dont feel comfortable telling him my problems and how I feel. Probably as I just told him before which ended up with him going downstairs to sleep (ah yes the wonderful guilt trip), because he is too close to me and I felt he wouldnt give me an accurate opinion.
If you cant talk to me without the pain and anger, Guiding Angels Ministries will close its doors. What the hell kind of shit is that? Be civil??? I thought I was being civil.
Yesterday we were fine, today hes sitting on his lofty throne and Im sitting here feeling like crap? What does he get out of all this?
Rolls eyes Its not what you say its how you say it he is soooo fond of telling me. Hey listen pal, I am sarcastic by nature and anyone who really knows me knows that they also know that its harmlessyou meant to tell me after a year you dont? Gods spare me!
Honestly my friends, the way I am feeling right now, if Guiding Angels Ministries closed..fine, if he left, fine.I know I am not the washed up miserable old hag with a chip on my shoulder he and his little Minister friend think I am, and in the end, isnt that what matters? What do you think?
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
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Has anyone tried these supplements? Do they give MGers more quality of life by improving memory and overall well being?Thanks!Barbel
It sure sounds to me like he is playing games with your head and that is not acceptable or Christian for that matter.
I say that you hang on to who you are - don't let him make you feel the least bit guilty - and let him play his games by himself. How could you have a positive attitude when someone is acting like he is? I can't imagine. Good luck to you.
Why is he holding the ministry over your head until you get help? I would think the ministy that you two opened was created to help women in crisis not to be based upon your mental state or his? When you two opened this, it stopped being about the two of you and became about the community you serve without losing sight of each other. I think the community would be losing a great asset if he were to close it. You need to remind him why it was opened in the first place. I am here for you anytime you need to talk.
But apparently when Ed was here two nights ago for 4 hours and I didnt "rescue" Jim thats not ok? What kind of crap is that? I told him if he was being so long winded you should have taken it upon yourself to excuse yourself and say something like "Im sorry Ed but the hour is late. Can we continue this tomorrow?"
Did he do that? No! Did he blame me for it? Yes. I am so sick of getting blamed for something clearly he did at the time have control over.
He askes me well where am I sleeping tonight? Downstairs or here? I said honey, I really dont care right now.
The point is LindaJean- the way I speak (and everyone who truly knows me knows I will give someone the shirt off my back DESPITE how I talk), has NOTHING to do with the Ministry, and shouldnt be revelvant to keeping its doors open, the only way Guiding Angels Ministries will keep its doors open is for us to be able to pay the rent on it!
Facial expressions and body language? I dont think so. Everything is being misinterpreted, and thats the point. Thanks LindaJean, and Angel.