Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group

Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.

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Help, I've turned into the abuser!

deleted_user
deleted_user
Hello everyone, my name is Tracy and I am a 34 year old female. I am a victim of lifelong emotional abuse. My last marriage was physically and verbally abusive. I've never understood how to love the right way. I was not properly loved in my family. I was a fat waste of space. My ex husband strangled, hit, punched, and pinned me down regularly. I've been divorced since 03.
In 01 I met a best friend who in 03 after my divorce became my love. We married in 04 and I was ready to have a life with my teddy bear. I found that I could never trust him in any capacity. I found that I was always on the defense and could never be happy. I verbally took this sweet loving man and ran him into the ground. He now feels like he is a worthless abomination. I am the bad guy! I want to desperately save my marriage and he has told me I have to change, but he loves me. I have taken Jesus in and have over the past month given my life to Christ which has really helped.
Has anyone ever had a similar situation? If so what did you do?
queenvalerie
queenvalerie
Get yourself some counseling and do it now. I don't mean when you get around to it, i mean NOW. Honey you've never learned any other way to love and you need to figure that out. Call a local DV hotline or shelter. You don't have be living there to get assistance.

Do this as soon as you can.
Loved1
Loved1
I too entered counseling at one point because I'd started to abuse him... I learned he was also abusing me. I wasn't aware of that. I'm sorry you're going through this, you are not alone. This last fight with my on/off boyfrnd I had a desire to strike out I haven't felt in years. I'm glad I didn't. I had to get clean and sober. I have to learn and use the tools of anger management, and be aware this trigger in me is so not ok. Many women in domestic violence situations get arrested for striking out, I don't want that to be me (coulda been many times). Good for you for reaching out, try a domestiv violence shelter counseling center that's where I've been helped. If you find yourself wanting to react abusively it is probably not a good situation to be in, not safe for you or him.
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