whether anyone reads this or not i don't know if it really matters, i just need to get it out. i'm so tired of people saying they will be there for me and they are never there when i need them. then my parents kicked me out because they are blaming me for everything that has gone wrong this past year and having us here is just too much for them. so i have 2 options. streets or living with druggies. either way i'll eventually loose my daughter. but atleast she would be warm and not in the cold weather getting sick. oh god i don't want to loose my baby girl! but i have no choice anymore. god i'm to the point i want to just curl up and die! i never thought i'd be so low in my life. but i am. i'm having really bad thoughts. i have nothing except clothing. that kept getting thrown in my face. that i'm worthless. i'll never be anything. so why even try anymore.
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??