This might be a bit long so I apologize for that. I am curious how others on this site have found that they've reacted. From the time I was very small I developed a habit of burying anything painful inside and not letting it out. Largely, that's because of the way my father reacted if I cried. If I didn't have a reason, or didn't want to tell him, then I wasn't allowed to cry--period. So most of the time I just tried not to show how much I was hurting. I distracted myself by spending most of my time glued to a television screen or with my nose in a book or absorbed by my music. It took a long time for me to really trust any therapist because of my dad being a "counsellor." The therapist I have just started seeing told me that this is a term that doesn't really mean anything--anybody can be a "counsellor." Well, my point is, that since I joined this site and have been reading some of your stories a lot of my past has come back to the foreground. I know that it's unresolved issues that I need to deal with. Someone once told me that when it all came back to bite me in the butt it would be like a mountain falling on me. That's a pretty accurate description. I'm just wondering if any of you have found that once you were out of your situations, did you find that when you tried to face all the pain, did you find that your emotions were going up and down all the time (like a roller coaster)--crying easily, or at strange times (I was in a financial aid advisor's office yesterday and the waterworks just wouldn't stop, which is the point that she called the campus psychologist and made an appointment for me, and I cried all through that session). I'm sure that part of it is that it's emotions that have been buried for so long they're finally being let out, but I'm wondering if any of you have experienced this?
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