I try to stay awake as long as I can because I know that falling asleep will mean waking up to another pointless day, feeling alone even, or more so espcially, in crowds. I think Max Merritt had a song way back that went "sick of living and scared of dying" so I eventually crash after doing everything to stay awake and wake up not refresh, not resigned, but ... I don't know, just aware that another day has me in it's glare like a rabbit in the headlights.
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