Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
hi all
soical services have put an order saying that my partner has to move out of my house and can only visit for 2 hours a day.
he was supposed to leave last friday. he hasnt.
we have been arguing on and off and i cant carry on like this.
i have a 2 and half year old son who he loves. im now 1 day overdue with his baby a girl.
he had me by the throat and slapped me 2 weeks ago and they said coz the risk hasnt minimazed thats why this order has been brought in.
his mum lives 4 doors away. he has a room there his mum has told him.
he wants to move his things and pretend hes gone and sneak around when people come round. i said i dont want to risk this and he keeps kicking off he went to grab me yesterday but managed to control himself. he accused me of being up to something all the time.
i went to bed early last night as i felt that rough he left saying he wont bother me anymore. i woke up this morning and hes in my bed.
he wants me to agree and say he can stay play along and it will be fine but coz he can see on my face i dont want to it means ive a hidden adgenda and theres a reason i want him out of the house.
im at a lost.
i no i will lose my son and unborn baby but when i say this he says no u wont or no one would keep there kids and that im more likey to lose them if he wasnt there as i would be classed as a single parent too stressed.
hes made me feel like i cant cope on my own and that anything i say or do could lead to me losing my children.
i have to attend a domistic violence programe and he reminds me before i go that im not a victim and not to believe it or say things as i like to play the victiom and im horrible to him and that im mental games with him.
i wish i could just vanish!
im going to be giving birth soon with in this week or next and im going to be thinking how long before i lose her and my son.
i need help but dont no what to do.
soical services have put an order saying that my partner has to move out of my house and can only visit for 2 hours a day.
he was supposed to leave last friday. he hasnt.
we have been arguing on and off and i cant carry on like this.
i have a 2 and half year old son who he loves. im now 1 day overdue with his baby a girl.
he had me by the throat and slapped me 2 weeks ago and they said coz the risk hasnt minimazed thats why this order has been brought in.
his mum lives 4 doors away. he has a room there his mum has told him.
he wants to move his things and pretend hes gone and sneak around when people come round. i said i dont want to risk this and he keeps kicking off he went to grab me yesterday but managed to control himself. he accused me of being up to something all the time.
i went to bed early last night as i felt that rough he left saying he wont bother me anymore. i woke up this morning and hes in my bed.
he wants me to agree and say he can stay play along and it will be fine but coz he can see on my face i dont want to it means ive a hidden adgenda and theres a reason i want him out of the house.
im at a lost.
i no i will lose my son and unborn baby but when i say this he says no u wont or no one would keep there kids and that im more likey to lose them if he wasnt there as i would be classed as a single parent too stressed.
hes made me feel like i cant cope on my own and that anything i say or do could lead to me losing my children.
i have to attend a domistic violence programe and he reminds me before i go that im not a victim and not to believe it or say things as i like to play the victiom and im horrible to him and that im mental games with him.
i wish i could just vanish!
im going to be giving birth soon with in this week or next and im going to be thinking how long before i lose her and my son.
i need help but dont no what to do.
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I gave my 2 week notice last Friday 13th. Now to join you fine people in a life of leisure and nothing else to do but to look out for myself....is it just me or does that sound pretty boring? My goal was to live to retire and I guess having to take early retirement because of health reasons wasn't exactly the way I had planned things. I just can't stay in that building that is reeking mildew...
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
if he is in violation of a court order, have him removed by the authorities and get the restraining order that you should have gotten the first time he put his hands on your throat.
why do you think you are going to lose your kids?
i agree, don't play the victim role. there is such a thing as clinging to our victimization. don't let that happen. cling to being a survivor. there is nothing empowering about being victimized.... and we can continue the victimization ourselves if we stew in the juices of the past. survive and thrive.
also, take note of whether there is any truth to you playing mind games. plenty of people do it, and if you have, it doesn't make any of what he has done "ok".... the only person you can ever change is you, so if you do have a mind game component of your own, erradicating it for the good of yourself and your children would be a good move. don't refuse to view yourself objectively just because the accusation came from him. if there is any merit in it, the only way you can overcome it is to face it. i'm not assuming its there, i'm just suggesting to take an honest look, thats all.
I can only tell you from my own experience that when i was physically abused by my (then) husband, I had hree children.
He was arrested and left the house. When asked if I wanted a restraining order, I was frighened and said no.
Social services was at my door in the morning, telling me that if I didn't do this, they would charge me with neglect of the children for not protecting them. Of course I did so immediately.
He's playing head games with you just as I've gone through. But,really, they are thinking more clearly and you must let them know as you are in a very vulnerable position having a new baby in a week.
Please do somethng before the choices are removed from you.
Call the authorities and have him arrested, since he hasn't vacated your place in the allotted time. CHange your locks, and drop his stuff off at his mum's house at a time when he is away from the house.
You don't have to take this, and you didn't deserve this. You deserve to raise your children in an environment that is void of the fear you have been living with by living with this man. For yourself and the sake of your children, I beg you to hold this man accountable for what he has done.
my son and unborn baby are on the at risk register under emontional abuse due to the dv.