i don't know how many read my original reaaally long question but to make a looong story short, my husband has ignored my feelings, hurt my feelings, cursed me out, humilated me, went out drinking w/ other women, listend to hard metal rock and sang out verses that had to do with 'slut', 'gonna die tonight', just a variety of crap lyrics, verbally abused my daughter out of the house, felt he could tell me what to wear, who to hang out with, who to talk to, and so jealous at times he would call or email me 20 times in a hours time and if i didn't respond he would start calling my employees wanting to know where I was, finally i gave up, i had an affair, makes me puck to even think about it but at the time i thought he'll just leave, nope...he told me how much he loved me and wanted to work things out...it's been a year and 1/2 of hell and just the other day he wrote me an email saying that he NEVER screwed around on me and then listed 5 women, all the ones i used to beg him not to hang with, he either kissed them, discussed detailed sex with them, hung out laughing with them while they had no panties on, etc..then went on to say, but I NEVER SCREWED around on you, i'm not built like that... I started going to DVIS so i could get support to get away from him and now, he just tells me, i don't want to be with you, i used to think you were a beautiful, wonderful women but not anymore. I just feel so empty and broken inside. For 10 years, i've been with a man thats never truley cared for me or loved me, how do i start over?