I exchanged an abusive home growing up for an abusive relationship as an adult. I think that in part I did this because I felt inadequate to make my own choices and decisions. stbx was always positive about what I should do and how I should do it. It left little room for thinking, but in some ways that was easier because that is what I was used to. I left stbx in Nov. and have made some good friends since then. I talk to one nearly everyday and value her input. She is a very strong personality and does not hesitate to tell me what she thinks. I don't always agree with her and her views of things. Right now I don't feel compelled to do everything she says, but sometimes I find myself just doing what she suggests so that I don't have to think about it. So, am I doing it again? Am I setting myself up to be controlled again? What do I need to watch out for to make sure that I do not wind up being a victim this time? Any suggestions would be great!
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