well i guess the best way to start this is to tell the story of the past and it is when i was young about 4-5 hard to judge from meories how young age wise but i had a father that whenever anything irritated him he wanted to beat on someone well i usually was the closest to hand for it and i also seemed to be the dumb kid who got into the way and made him beat me before he could get my sister well one day i had my best friend over and she was maybe a year older then me and we were playing out back and trying to be quiet as to not wake my father and suddenly he stuck his head outside and asked us to come in and play hide and seek with him and i remember thinking this odd since he never wanted us in the house but we went and hide and i remember her going into my room to hide and i went to the toy closet and then after a few mins i remember hearing my bedroom door shut and lock i tryed to open it and then thats when i heard the first scream and crying and i pounded on the door trying to open it and help her and i tryed everything i could think of even ringing the doorbell to make him think someone was at the door but i just couldn't get the door open well after what seemed like an eternity of my flinging myself at the door it opened and he came out and said so you want in so bad well he beat me so bad i could hardly move then dragged me into the room and tied me to a chair and i could see her lieing there on the bed crying with her clothes ripped and i could do nothing but watch as he rapped her then he got bored with her and insisted that i would be interesting to play with so he started trying to stick his penis into my mouth and make me swallow it. well this seemed to happen more often over the next year until i finally found someone who belived me and i keep remembering him saying at his trial if i said a word he would kill me. so my question is how can something like this be dealt with i have seen numerous therapist and they all say just let it go and move on but it keeps comeing back and tormenting my dreams
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