I picked up 6 puppies from some people that weren't being taken care of properly and I found out two days later when them because very ill that they had parvo virus. I took them to the vet and now have a vet bill to pay for the puppies I used all my credit around town to get help for these little puppies and by the time I realized they weren't going to make it no one would put them down for me. I had to watch all of these puppies die slowly, they has blood comming out of their butts and their mouths they wouldn't stop puking. It is the most horrible death I have ever seen an animal go through and I would have given anything to have had the guts to shoot all of them so they wouldn't have to suffer but I couldn't and their was nothing I could do about it. I feel terrible about this and have been having these extreme feelings of guilt and saddness. I cannot get ahold of the people that gave me the puppies and weren't taking care of them to begin with but I have a vets letter saying that the puppies must have had parvo before I got them because even the puppy I gave away before I even brought them home died. I'm not sure what I should do to make myself feel better, I feel so guilty and sad about the puppies, I love animals and to see helpless little puppies die like that just kills me inside it was the first time I felt the real danger of hurting or possibly killing myself in a year now. I haven't SI'd in a year and that almost brought it back and ever since I've been kind of fighting the urge. I hope someone can give me advice as to how I should get over or past this.
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??