So, I am in therapy and am very busy moving forward from the abuse/disclosure, and all that goes with it. My kids are all in therapy. My daughter is 13 and disclosed in June that my ex husband (we just got divorced) molested her from the ages of 6 to 8, over 100 times. I've posted the whole story on this group so don't want to get into it all again, but I've come a long way. I'm going to nursing school, and we are overall doing pretty well, finally, though she really struggles with severe PTSD.
The trial is coming in March. I'm hoping he accepts a plea before it gets to that point so that he admits his guilt, and we can get some closure and him some jailtime. I have nightmares because I am so busy during the day doing all that I need to, that my therapist says nightmares are your mind's way of dealing with all of the emotions that you stuff down, without active defense mechanisms. I'm used to the nightmares, overall.
My biggest fear is that he is going to get away with this. He's facing a hundred counts of 5 felonies. I play out the trial in my head, and what could happen. He's damaged my little girl so much and people tell me I need to prepare myself for the fact that he could actually get away with this. There is nothing I can do to prepare myself for that. Nothing. I can't. That is just not ok. He's not going to get away with this, right? He has the best defense attorney money can buy. She used to work for DA's office in the sex crimes division, prosecuting these monsters, but she switched sides, probably for the money. I realize I have to accept what happens, no matter what, but the thought of that monster getting away with this, makes me want to kill him. I understand why people take the law in their own hands now. I am a Christian woman, and do have faith and I would never commit murder, and this "feeling", this ugly, dark feeling, scares me. I pray and give it to God and do find peace, but it creeps up whenever I see pictures on facebook of my sweet baby at 5 and when I see what this has done to her. My girlfriend ran into the child molester TWICE today, at Starbucks and a restaurant. She's struggling with meds to make her sleep as she is afraid of the night, countless appointments (getting her a new psychiatrist who specializes in adolescent trauma) and he's living the life, going to Starbucks and restaurants. How is this just? Makes no sense to me.
I am thankful to have found this support group. My daughter who is in college disclosed 16 months ago that she was abused by a priest at her Catholic school when she was 8. We have been to some therapy separately and together since that time. I of course have extreme guilt even though I know that there was no way I could have known. I think back to specific incidents that I now know why they...
I’ll try to keep this brief....yet I may not have much success. Basic background...a year and a half ago, I found out my husband was molesting two of our daughters, and grooming two other daughters. We have 8 kids. We escaped, he confessed to me and I recorded it...5 times. He was arrested and convicted with a deferred sentence. There is a protective order and he hasn’t seen the kids since we...