Okay, there is not enough time to get into it all, but I'll give the most recent issues. 2 Years ago our daughter Jen at age 10 falsely accused my husband ( her Dad ) of molesting her. he was subsequently arrested and forced to live away from us for 6 months. Even after she admitted to lying the courts were slow and it took 10,000 dollars and six months to get him home. There is a very long story to all this but take my word for it he was falsely accused. Any way we had several issues with her before this incident and have many many more since. Just in the past two weeks I have been hit and punched, and caught her drinking. The hitting and punching episode was over telling her to pick up markers after she had written all over her younger sister. She proceeded into her room and starting throwing things and tearing stuff off the walls. I went in and found her with fists made and teeth clenched. I asked her what on earth she thought she was doing and she said if she didn't get all the markers she knew she would be in trouble and I informed her that she was just getting herself in more trouble by trashing her room. She got angrier and I blurted out what is your problem and she said I am going to punch you. Well instinct took over and I got ion her face and said try it and you will find out what the inside of those walls look like real quick. Well to my surprise she tried. She started throwing punches and thrashing and I grabbed her arms pinned them behind her back and sat on her for almost an hour before she calmed down. This is not the first time I have left her room with bruises. When she was six she knocked me in the jaw with her foot on purpose with the intention of hitting me. She gets very angry very quickly and it is always taken out on me. But I am the disciplinarian in the home so it is to be expected I guess. Then two nights ago we were all at a family members home and in the basement having a few drinks. The next day when we all woke up my daughter was complaining that she felt sick. i had a suspicion at the time but said nothing. I sat on it until this morning and decided I would try tricking her into admitting that she had snuck some alcohol that night. So I told her that my nephew, who is 6 months younger than her had told me what they had done. She was immediately defensive and said she didn't do anything she had just told him that she did. Well, since he never told me anything I am now running off the assumption that she did drink and was hungover all day Sunday not just sick. I know this is allot I guess but I am only naming the big things. i haven't even begun on the small stuff like telling her little sister who just turned seven that she wishes she were dead, that she hates her, lying just to get her in trouble, swearing at her profusely, telling her awful bedtime stories in hopes that she will have nightmares, hitting, throwing her stuff away, it is endless. And I have been to three different counselors with no help. The last one told me that because Jen would not open up and talk there really wasn't much she could do to help her. My mother in law thinks I am just picking on Jen all the time and blah blah. My own mother just thinks it is funny because it is happening to me. She has told me she has no empathy. But I am not looking for empathy I need help! The Dr. looks at me like I am the one with the problem. Jen is a perfect child in public, she doesn't let other people see her act that way and she knows they think it is all me now and she thinks it is funny. Unfortunately her father is afraid of her now and I don't blame him. She has threatened to tell people that I beat her. But the way I see it is if she doesn't have me to take it out on then whoever she winds up with will eventually see it and then they will finally know I am not nuts! I guess I just need some experienced advice. I have been at my wit's end for way to long. I am lost in what to do or say with her.
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