Well, this probably doesn't count as advice, but my 3 yr old hits us sometimes too. Most of the time she spits on us though. We send her to time out and it works ok. Sometimes we take away her cartoons or special treats too.

I wish I knew, my son is hitting too. H's getting so much better though. He wouldn't dare hit me or his dad but he hits EVERYONE else including the pediatrician. It's mortifying I know. I just try being stern with my son. And as horrible as it sounds, I allow other children to hit him back and when he starts crying to explain to him that other people don't like it either. It seems to work for the most part!

Have you talked to your peds doc? He may be hyper and does not know how to show his anger or boredom. It's not easy dealing with a child that does this. It's hard when they are that young. I say ask your doctor what you should do or if they can find someone for you to talk with. good luck and have a wonderful christmas.

my daughter is going through a similar phase. my mother told me that kids go through different phases... my little girl used to love to cuddle in her bed and read a book, then sing a couple songs. now she is sooooo bad at bedtime that i normally end up leaving the room angry and just wanting to cry! and getting her dressed into pj's... i feel like letting her go to bed completely butt naked. and i think reasoning with a toddler is pointless. i jsut tell myself... "i'm the mom, and i'm the boss... i'm bigger and smarter than he/she is... a 2 year old can't outsmart a 30 year old" (or can they lol...) that's what i tell myself anyways... if she's hitting me, i just stop her. if she is yelling in my face.. she goes to her room (i gave up on timeouts... may work for some, but not for mine!)

i'm going nuts too! i think its normal!)

This must be normal because my two year old has begun to do this. SHe however only does it to me. She would never dream of hitting her dad. Getting her dressed to go anywhere makes me not want to go anywhere, and bedtime what is that? She is in a big girl bed and thinks that she can get up whenever she wants. If it weren't illegal to use restraints I would. She gets mad and throughs horrible fits and my husband tells me to get her under controle, but I am at a loss on how to do that.
SO I think that 2 year olds can out smart us 30 year old parents.

my boyfriend and i gave up on taking her out anywhere. we don't go to restaurants with her especially. and she KNOWS how to manipulate any situation. i've figured out that she loves to make both of us angry. as soon as we raise our voices, she smiles!! so we have to remain emotionless (which is soooo hard on the nerves... bottling up how you feel!) but it is more effective than losing my cool. but you know... those fleeting moments where she is fun to be with, when all i want to do is laugh and hug her, and actually want to be around her... makes you forget (ever so briefly of course lol) about those moments where you want to sit in the middle of a room and scream and cry and have you own tantrum. even tonight... she's sleeping, after a hellish half hour of trying to put pj's on... i will go in and watch her sleep.

My 2 1/2 year old is going through something similiar.

No matter what we say its NO NO NO! I have to put her in time out - even if that means I go to time out with her. Away from the t.v. - the toys - other people.

Seems to be working.

LISTEN UP IT IS VERY IMPORTANT-

I am going to say this as properly as I can but to get the FULL EFFECT of what I am saying I will say it in a more laxed way.

My son at about 20months started to show more aggression. He was fine when he was at his first day care. I changed him to another school when he turned 2. Then he decided to show is ass. Bighting , hitting, throwing things etc. Now there was a lot going on then. I let one of my friends stay with me until she could get on her feet. She was ummm.. Agressive, negative, just bad energy all around. When her son (3yo) came on the weekends would cus him out. Her son older than my liked to restle, my child liked it until he didn't then it turned into a fight. So when she moved out I thought things would be better. SLIGHTLY. I gave it some time still only partially better. I then put him on a bed time schedual (took 2 weeks). That worked better but he still had violent streaks and tried to get buck with me. I ripped him a new asshole. I do not condone any abuse of any kind however if I have to tap him 2 good times a month to keep him from a path of jail I will. Then I find out only through his dad picking him up (3 or4 times a month) from school his behavior patterns there. He was bighting, kicking, throwing things, not listening and talking back. Now every time I tell him to do something (he won't dare say no again) and he begins to say something like not right now or I am doing something else I say "Are you talking back" he says "no ma'am" I say then do what I asked thank you. And he does it. Sometimes if he is trying to rebellion he will keep talking then he gets flicked in the mouth and told "stop talking back". Every morning before school he go through the list of what big boys do and don't do and he repeats everything I say so there is no confusion.
- no kicking, no scratching, no bighting, no throwing things.......
-listen to Mrs. Card, Mr. Hussan, Mrs........
(I name each teacher so that he is very clear and it is very specific)

I AM PROUD TO SAY THAT ONCE THIS REGEMENT STARTED I HAVE HAD NO COMPLAINTS ABOUT HIS AGGRESSION.

He still has some issues with sharing and knowing appropriate times when to focus and when to play. I started playing more slow and taking tuns games like memory match and he is really beginning to get a hang of turns.

The answer to the going out problem is NOT STAYING HOME. The reason, for my son at least, he doesn't get when he needs to be focused and disciplined and when he can play is because I gave up. I decided to just not go anywhere so he wouldn't drive me nuts by running around. Then I realized, HOW WILL HE EVER LEARN IF HE NEVER HAS TO? If all he does is play around the house (in whatever he chooses to where) WHY ON EARTH WOULD UNDERSTAND THAT THAT IS NOT APPROPRIATE EVERYWHERE. I started to let him go places like basketball games. Even if we go to the park I make him do arbitrary things just to make sure he understands that he needs to listen. - this step I just began because it is freezing over here and I really don't want to go out. I did notice a difference, if I take him out, library, movies etc.. And assure him you listen to me AT ALL TIMES and AT ALL PLACES he begins to transfer that.

Last but not least. 1.2.3. system
Not listening. If you have to use this system make sure you make them tell you why they did/didn't do what they were told. If they can't talk explain why it was wrong and repeat that after there punishment. ex- Lijah why were you not allowed to eat icecream tonight? answer- because I through a tantrum. If they don't answer they are still in time out
1. ask
2. warn
3. punish

or
Is listening
1. ask
2. praise
3. reward
I hope this helps.

I got most of this tips from my mom and coworkers(they are therapists) when I was pulling out my hair.