Parenting Teenagers (12-18) Support Group

This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of teenagers (12 to 18 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development.

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daughter on drugs & out of control!!!

deleted_user
deleted_user
The worst feeling I ever felt; I felt yesterday. Securing my house so that my 17 year old daughter could not come in. I never thought I would be one of those parents kicking my child out of the house because of drugs. She does whatever she wants and doesn't care about the consequences. I tell her to stay home she leaves anyway. She will probably fail her Sr. year being only 1 month away from graduation. I have never felt so out of control, depressed, and scared in my life. I feel like a failure as a parent. Is tough love the answer??? Let her go out in the big bad world and figure it out? Watch her fall hard before she realizes the choices she made were bad?? Will it then be too late???? I'm so scared for that "phone call" Can anyone relate??? Suggestions??? Advise???? Help?????
Liane999
Liane999
Where is her father in all of this?
deleted_user
deleted_user
Hi bombfiregirl,

I sure wish I could help you with the answers you seek. My daughter is only 13 and it's only starting for me. Tough love has to be the hardest thing a parent can do, and I honestly thing is tougher on us than them.

My thoughts are with you and I'm sending you big hugs XOXO
deleted_user
deleted_user
her loser father lives in NY (i'm in AZ) and he hasn't been in her life since she was 8.....my husband (her step father) pretty much let's me handle everything and always has...been married to him since she was 2....yeah i'm feeling like a single mother
deleted_user
deleted_user
I have no answers for you but you're not alone. I have that same feeling every day. I'm scared to leave my 16 year old in my house alone, and don't allow her to have a key. I'm scared her "friends" and her will come over and rob us blind, or worse, even hurt someone so she can get her way. I am so sorry that you are going through this. I know how hopeless it feels. Don't feel like a failure. Everyone makes there own choices regardless of our mistakes as parents. We all do the best we know how. In the end, people with horrible parents can still turn out great, and people with great parents can still turn out horrible. Each one of us is responsible for the condition of our own conscience and character. Don't let her make you feel like a failure. I'll be praying for you.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Sometimes the greatest gift we can give our children is Tough Love. You may end up saving their lives by doing some tough love. Since your child is still a minor, you can have her taken to a treatment facility where she can get the help that she really needs. Instead of locking her out of the house and letting her do as she pleases. As long as she's still in danger out of your house, she isn't going to get any better. Only intervention and treatment can help her. So please stop her self destructive behavior before it's too late. Save her from herself.
deleted_user
deleted_user
oh my..we are in the same boat!
I have kicked my on out of the house as well. I never thought I could do it. It sucks. People keep telling me its for his own good. but it feels so horrible!
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