Forbidden love can be a real challenge! I'd let here know that "i know" and that she is going to be more tightly supervised. First, I would make calls to the doctor for a check up (std's) and birth control and counseling by an unbiased physician to be sure that she has been a consenting participant. The second call would be to a family counselor so you can work on rebuilding trust -- this incident will certainly take a toll on your relationship. I hope you will consider both these options. Good Luck!

i think penpal has a good point, but how overwhelming for you.....my oldest son is 15 and my youngest is 13...we really try to teach them abstinence is best....but they make their own choices.....you're in my prayers....

Please don't feel like a failure, you could not have known that she would have sex at that age; it doesn't mean that you have been a bad parent, nor does it mean that she is a bad person. Penpal is right about getting your daughter to a doctor for a check-up. Then talk to your daughter. I'm sure that there are things that she couldn't put into her journal, and maybe there are things that she learned from this experience that will keep her from doing it again for some time. If you can't talk to her, or she can't talk to you, then you should look into family counseling. Just remember that there isn't any blame to assign; no one is a bad person because of this. I will pray that you and your daughter will be able to communicate and reestablish the bond that you had before.

I would talk with her about it and let her know that your aware of whats going on. I know your really hurting over this cause I would also. Its so hard to be a parent but one thing is you dont want to push her to much of leaving home or anything like that. Im just trying to take it day by day with my daughter too and hope that everything turns out for the good for both of us. Just hang in there

Being a parent is so hard! My heart goes out to you and I agree totally with those who are telling you that you are not a failure! That could happen to any parent. We try our best and love our children, but they will still do things that we know are not good for them. I would just suggest talking with her, perhaps wait a few days until you are less emotional, and see what she says. I would explain why you feel that a sexual relationship at such a young age is not a good thing. Best wishes and hang in there!

You are not a failure. Of course you should try to talk to her but she may continue to have sex. She needs to go on birth control. She's too young to have a baby & it wouldn't be fair to a child.

I am no expert when it comes to girls, but I remember being 15. and my parents preaching made me want to do it more. They would not let me get birth control and I was pregnant before my 16th birthday. Now, I know that is not my parents fault. I knew how to not get pregnant..but I think it's better to be safe than sorry.

I inherited my 13 year old neice, I found out she was having sex, drinking,smoking
anything that she could do wrong she was doing it, I 1st put her on birth control as I was not about to be Auntie, I let her know that I will always know what where, when, who she was with or going. I kept communication open as I can't change what in the past and that I could only work with what was her future.
I can't tell you how many times we fought and she said she hated me, But I stayed strong, And can say at the age of 21 she has grown up to be a beautiflu young lady with a good job and a bright future ahead of her.

So in the and my advice is to stay strong,calm but assertive, they do grow up and hopefully will make the right choices on her own..

When my oldest had sex for the first time I wasn't on board with it. He was 17 1/2 and it was with his girlfriend and in our home. When my next oldest had sex for the first time he was 2 months shy of his 16th birthday (his gf is 17) and I accepted this occurred. Why? Maturity. While I would have preferred my 2nd to have waited, I chose not to freak out because he made the mature choice to come to me and talk to me that this was a possibility in his future. He waited a few months before making the choice. I asked him if our talk gave him the green light. He said no, we would have done it eventually anyway but preferred that I knew and preferred that he was prepared to make such a choice. He and his girlfriend are extremely close. Both of them are excellent students and very responsible in their personal lives. He is the polar opposite of my oldest, who, at 19, i still don't feel is responsible enough to be having sex. My 2nd boy came to me and told me, "you told C (the oldest) something that always stuck with me... if you are not mature enough to talk about it and make responsible choices, then you are not responsible enough to be doing it". So I while my 19 year old still struggles with this concept and always has, my 16 year old has a full grasp on his role as a responsible thinking teenager.

Yes, I'd prefer he wait...but how he handled this sure beats the alternative... not telling me and getting himself and her in to trouble.

I would say to her that you were talking to a friend who told you that her daughter was having sex and wanted her to go on the pill. Or that a friend or you saw on the tele a programme about teen prengancies and just thought maybe you would talk to her about it. But sometimes teenage girls write down their fantasies and they are their wishes not real life. I don't know i suppose you will sort it out.
Like in Freaky Friday with Jamie Lee Curtis and Lindsay Lohan when the daughter becomes the mum and acts as a theorapist for a day. She gets a lady in who says she read sometihing in her daughters diary and her daughter says if she was really doing it she wouldn't write about it.

HOPE YOU SORT IT OUT HONEY!

Love Me Dee!

I wrote a diary when i was a teenager but i heven't read them over so i can't remember if it was all real or some fantacy. I had a boyfriend at the age of 14 wasn't ready to have sex though.