Parenting Preschoolers (3-5) Support Group
This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of preschoolers (3 to 5 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development. Join to share your stories and get advice.
my son is separated from his wife and they have joint custody of my 4 year old grandson....up til 4 weeks ago he spent 1/2 the week with each of them but now whenever my son tries to take him to his house he will not go in and if he is forced he just screams and has a tantrum till my son says ok i will take you back to your mum then he is fine so now my son has no sleepovers at his house with his son....any one any idea what is wrong and why this is happening....my grandson has a speech delay so does not talk and this makes it all the more difficult.....help please....we are at our wits end
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
This is very, very hard. My 18 month old used to run when his dad and grandmother came to pick them up. He literally ran into the neighbors yard once. I had no choice about it. There was a court order, and their dad was not going to back down. My four year old would tell me that my toddler would cry for me the whole night.
Here is my advice:
1. Do not blame mom.
2. Do not put the child in charge.
Your son needs to think about what he wants as far as custody and parenting time. If he thinks it's in his son's best interest to spend more time with mom, then talk it over with mom, and see if the schedule can be modified. Research shows that every other weekend and one night every week is very good for kids and parents.
Once the parents make a decision, it has to be honored. If you let the child dictate where he stays at 4 years old, he will become very insecure. He needs to know that his parents are in control, and that their time and attention is not dependent on his temper tantrums. If he's in charge, he will undoubtedly have guilt about what he's decided. He will also be likely to become very spoiled, and become expert at manipulating his parents, playing one off the other.
This is not the same as not taking his feelings into consideration. His feelings ought to be validated. And his feelings ought to play some part in the decision that the parents make. But it's got to be their choice and not his whim.
It's been 5 years and my children have adjusted to the change. Things are more relaxed now, and my ex and I adjust the schedule as needed. Your son and his ex will get to this point too, but it takes time. Try to be kind to mom and don't take over your son's job here. It will not be good for you if mom resents you.