
Parenting Preschoolers (3-5) Support Group
This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of preschoolers (3 to 5 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development. Join to share your stories and get advice.
My grandma always says, "He won't go to college in diapers" meaning that they'll do it in their own time.
You say you've tried everything, do you ask him constantly and make a big deal over it? Maybe he doesn't go because you've made it a big deal? Kids like to feel like they have control over something and you WANT him to go potty in the toilet and he can control whether HE wants to so he does.
So you could make a big push for it and place the potty in a place of importance with a prize nearby that can't be touched untill he does. But it sounds like you've tried that route.
Or you could back off for a month and not ask him about it at all. Change soley to diapers--not even pullups. IF he asks tell him that he has to wear these until he's a big boy. Make him lay down to change him. Don't make changing diapers a fun activity, make it a chore with no cuddling (because he might want to be the baby). Still leave the potty chair in a place of importance and ignore it completely.
After a few weeks of sterile treatment during changing time, you can reintroduce the concept of big-boy potty and big-boy privileges.
The bigger deal you make of it the more control he has. I know that at preschools the want ALL children to be potty trained by 2 1/2 but that isn't realistic. First of all, all children mature at different times. Secondly, it is a fact that boys train later than girls.
My daughter was easy (2 1/2) but my son did a lot of what you son did. Did well for a while and had a bad relapse. I went back to diapers for a few months and then started talking to him about being a big boy and special underwear and finally got through to him. He was probably almost 4. (time gets blurred). He wanted to be considered a baby. He wanted me to treat him like a baby. Now he gets upset if I call him "honey, baby, or sweetie" he only wants to be called "big boy".
Good luck to you and remember, no one goes to college in diapers.
I remained consistant, and heres what i did.
I put the pot beside the toilet and we would take "potty breaks" and I and my child would sit on the potty until we both did something. Whoever did go to the potty got some mini M&Ms for a reward. If he and she didn't do anything on the potty, they simply wouldn't get anything until they did go...and that included TV, outside activities, ect.
I showed them who was the authority, and they would suffer reward until they would do something on the pot. When they get tired of not being able to do anything, they will use the potty eventually.
I would say things like...we can't go to the park if your don't poop, so when you have to go let mommy know.
In the mornings I would give juice and breakfast, and I almost had their bowel movements on a scedule, so it made it easier for me.
Don't give up...be consistant, and don't show you child that your frustrated (not saying that you are)... but let them see your dissapointment by taking rewards AKA things they like to do.
Hope this helps.
Another thing, the pull ups can get really confusing because they feel like a diaper to a child. buy underware with plastic underware covers at Wal-Mart.
Then they are more eager to keep their pants dry, it gets them used to a diffrent feel besides the diaper.