Parenting Big Kids (5-8) Support Group

This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of big kids (5 to 8 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development. Join to share your stories and get advice.

571 Members

1,135 Posts

0 Online

deleted_user 10/21/2007

I would never think that my 8 year old daughter Jessica has ADD but lately I'm wondering. She seems like a normal child. Active? yeah... too much?? I dont know... I think every 8 year old child is a little bit too active comparing to what their parents would like them to be. I always said kids are kids. Every kid is like that. But now after over a year looking at Jessica's bad grades and seeing her struggling with her homework I'm thinking I might be wrong. Last year she was struggling and had to go to summer school but I blamed that on our recent move and me being so absorbed with my 5 year old who was diagnosed in January with Leukemia.This year they are both in the same school and I thought she would pick up but no. I read and read and I checked the symptoms of ADD and she has almost every one of them. I don't know what to do. My friends and family always told me that I'm tough when my five year old was in and out of the hospital. But now I'm really worry. I feel so bad for Jessie and it breaks my heart to see her try and fail. I know I should take her to the doctor and have checked but I guess I'm just fooling myself by saying shes just a kid and she will grow out of it. I dont know what to do.. PLEASE HELP

deleted_user 10/22/2007

I was like you......didn't think my daughter had ADHD. Finally, it was my older daughter's counselor that asked me if she had ever been tested. She said that she was pretty sure that my daughter did have it, and, gave me a Connor's Rating scale for me to complete, as well as one for her teacher to complete. From that point on, it was in black and white.....I felt it was time to get her evaluated and seen by a doctor. It's been the best thing that I have done for my daughter. To see her face when she is finally doing well, and getting scores that she never could in school. You may want to deny it, and I know I did, but, do it for her.....get her seen by a professional who can help her turn around. I think the earlier it's done, the better.
Good luck!
Kinz

deleted_user 10/22/2007

Thank you Kinz for your sharing your story and for your advice. I've read that most of the kids with ADD or ADHD receive medical treatment and after that they become really mellow. Is that what happened to your daughter? I am really happy with the way she acts, I mean I know shes active but it doesnt really bother me. I just hate seeing her failing school and feeling bad about herself. Her self esteem took a huge dive.

deleted_user 11/21/2007

I to have wondered about my little one for some time. Her therpist brought it up and I told him I had wondered about it. She is not active so I know it is not ADHD,but I did go on line and completed the test and she is very high for it. They will be doing the test there soon.
My grand son had a major change once they figured it all out. He is a joy to be around now. And he is doing wonderful in school now to.
My worry all a long is the kids I see that are so doped up they can't even speak a full sentence. But he asured me those are the kids parents are giving them way to much. So as long as she can be her normal self without the major mood swings and be able to focus better in school I will try the med's.
I think we all fear the unknown, and as you said you did what I did I researched it and found her to be a high possitive.So now it is up to me to get her the right help.
My grand son is the one that made me a true believer of ADD.

deleted_user 11/21/2007

It doesn't hurt to talk to your child's doctor and her teacher. A very small amount of medication could help her be more successful in school, and you wouldn't have to give it to her on the weekends or vacation since she is not bothering you with her behaviors. Just a little something to help her focus, learn and be successful could be just what she needs. Good luck - you have a lot on your plate!

deleted_user 11/21/2007

that is one of the first questions I ask, would I have to give it to her on the weekends etc...and they said no. Plus there is a patch now. You put it on in the morning before school and take it off when they get home.
I meant to ask before how is your other child that has leukemia? You & your family will be in my prayers

deleted_user 11/23/2007

you do have to be very careful with the medication. my aunts boy had ADHD. she was in her 40's when she had him anyway now years later he is mentally retarded because every time he would act up a little she was making him take pills so she did not have to deal with it. I wonder about my 6 year old sometimes and if she has it or not she has a very hard time in school. she was in preschool for 3 year and now it looks like she may be in kindergarten again next year. we are finding ways to deal with her at home, but that does not help with school.

deleted_user 11/25/2007

There seems to be such a stigma on ADD or ADHD. It is not like some infectios disease. It only means that the childs brain works a little different. I work at an alternative school for ESE students with behavior problems. I only have 5 students at this time and 3 of them have ADHD and only one of them is medicated. The two that aren't break my heart. They could be so much more successful if the could sit still and concentrate on the work. They wouldn't have neer the amount of behavior problems that they do. Most of my students are from low income families and have medicade. The parents just won't take them to the doctor. They are setting them up for failure. I am not big on giving children a bunch of medication but sometimes it can be benificial. The main thing is, we all want our children to succeed; sometimes we have to give them the tools to do that. Also know that there are several different types of medication for ADHD. Sometimes one will work for your child and another won't. The doctor usually starts with a very low dose and then increases it gradually until it is right. They don't just start out with a high dose and your child is like a zombi. Hope this helps. Good luck!!

deleted_user 11/27/2007

It's all about YOU being an advocate for your child. YOU need to be willing to help your child succeed AND have a normal life.
I occasionally feel guilty about having to give my son meds for ADHD and ODD, but he's having better days at school, and more enjoyable to be around. He still gets goofy and silly and brilliant, but when he gets into a mood and feels that anger, I can redirect him and calm him down. We used to have 1 hour tantrums.
He's so creative and smart and now those stories can come out with the meds and the raving, hitting, spitter doesn't.
Make sure you know what you're giving your child and watch for the signs of overdose.(being catatonic, etc). Beyond that, meds can be a great gift to give your child: being able to cope in the everyday world.

deleted_user 11/27/2007

Your Aunt may have been over dosing him.And it casued Brain damage. But think about it you over dose on anything it will casue some type of damage. A lot of people I think over dose,I have seen kids that could not carry on a converasation with you on the meds, parents giving them to much. But I have seen other kids blossom on the med's.
The way the Doc explained it to me is...I hope I can tell it right.... If you take both your hands and put your finger tips together and wiggle them like they are patty caking/taping together. BUT now move them...your finget tips side by side and try taping them together. That is what ADD is in the brain. Themeds bring the finger tips back together..tip to tip. Of the finger tips are representing the nerve endings??? in the brain.
WE fear the unknown,but if a child truely has this the medicine will help.

deleted_user 11/27/2007

Jade5 can you tell me the link to this online ADHD test? I would really like to try that before I go to see my daughters doctor.

Join the Conversation

Posts You May Be Interested In

acknowlodging

Posted by: GrassIsGreen

Last Reply: GrassIsGreen 02/14/2016

15

I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
come unwind in the bp lounge

Posted by: irishwriter

Last Reply: MayB 12/10/2019

7908

theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??

acknowlodging

come unwind in the bp lounge