Parenting Big Kids (5-8) Support Group
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I think this has been posted before, but I couldn't find it. My (almost 9y.o.) d/s has been coming home from school making claims that everyone in his class gets an allowance for doing chores (and some are pretty outrageous amounts!!!). He doesn't get an allowance for two reasons:
1. I don't feel he should be paid to be a member of the family and pitch in like we all do AND
2. I never received an allowance growing up. If I wanted extra money, I'd pet sit and then, when I got older, babysit for friends, family & neighbors. I think he's too young for allowance....maybe it's just me, but I think it's frivilous, unecessary and contributing to the growing list of THINGS that kids have and don't need (mine included...with his iPod and game systems galore).
What does he need chore money for at his age? He get's birthday money, money at Christmas AND occasionally, we treat him to a little something for an exceptional test score or report card ON TOP OF the small fortune "earned by the tooth fairy!" Aside from that, he's absolutely swimming in extracurricular activities, social events, toys, gadgets and "all the right clothes!"
Am I wrong...I get that it could teach him how to save money, but he has another 5,6,7 years to learn that & I just don't feel I should owe him money for taking out the trash when it's a job I just expect of him anyway....Now, extra jobs above and beyond I could see offering to pay him a little for, tasks during spring/seasonal cleaning and extra little things. Am I just talking around myself to ease my guilt about the whole thing or does anyone else out there share my viewpoint. Feedback is appreciated :)
1. I don't feel he should be paid to be a member of the family and pitch in like we all do AND
2. I never received an allowance growing up. If I wanted extra money, I'd pet sit and then, when I got older, babysit for friends, family & neighbors. I think he's too young for allowance....maybe it's just me, but I think it's frivilous, unecessary and contributing to the growing list of THINGS that kids have and don't need (mine included...with his iPod and game systems galore).
What does he need chore money for at his age? He get's birthday money, money at Christmas AND occasionally, we treat him to a little something for an exceptional test score or report card ON TOP OF the small fortune "earned by the tooth fairy!" Aside from that, he's absolutely swimming in extracurricular activities, social events, toys, gadgets and "all the right clothes!"
Am I wrong...I get that it could teach him how to save money, but he has another 5,6,7 years to learn that & I just don't feel I should owe him money for taking out the trash when it's a job I just expect of him anyway....Now, extra jobs above and beyond I could see offering to pay him a little for, tasks during spring/seasonal cleaning and extra little things. Am I just talking around myself to ease my guilt about the whole thing or does anyone else out there share my viewpoint. Feedback is appreciated :)
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
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Has anyone tried these supplements? Do they give MGers more quality of life by improving memory and overall well being?Thanks!Barbel
but I recall from my own childhood that our (very small) allowance wasn't related to chores at all. It was a little like a right of passage...you're getting older and you get so much each week to save or spend, but the consequences are also yours...
my twin brother always SAVED, I always SPENT, so every few months he'd buy something really cool that I couldn't.
I think it was good for learning, PLUS, if we wanted *anything* my parents would ALWAYS say, use your allowance if you want ____. and that got us off her back. and they didn't go out and buy us stuff unless it was our birthday or christmas, that was it, so if we wanted something, the allowance was it until we were old enough to babysit, etc.
These are all things she doesn't need to do but she wants to help me. I don't ask her to do it and I like that she wants to. We told her that if she would like we would give her a dollar at the end of the week and with that she could use it at the gas station to get her gatorade that she likes to have after her soccer practice. She's not allowed to have anything but milk and water at home so it's a treat for her.
It also stops her from asking for stuff when we stop at the gas station. If she doesn't have any money for gatorade she'll just drink her water instead and not even ask me to get her anything.
Maybe it's too much of a lesson for at this age but it's stopped her constantly badgering me for stuff and the last time I let her pick something out at the store she seemed surprised and genuinely thankful.