I am so scared of these next few days, I have been panicing like crazy, which is usually rare for me...I had it under control. I have been to counseling, I have gone to group therapy, I meditate, read, write, 12 steps, higher power, friends....I feel like I am slipping in my whole life....I am so on the verge....back in the day I would have been drinking or starving or binging or cutting or trying to kill myself....now I just have to deal with it and it is very hard, lonely and scary.....I want to numb, I want to suppress, I am trying not to fall, but it is triggering my panic attacks like crazy!
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