I posted a few comments on here a couple of months ago, and for a while I was doing better. I had finally started eating normal again, letting myself enjoy cookies and other peoples cooking again, and then all hell broke loose. The morning of Mardi Gras, I woke up to my middle son puking all over my floor. I just assumed that it was an ear infection, and then he did it two more times during the day. By that night, he was doing a little better and I finally ate a bag of chips. The next day, I woke up and brought my kids to school, I was calming down a little bit, and my ex husband was going to get the two older kids for me from school and keep them for a night. I was hoping to finally be ok again. You see, I'm petrified of getting a stomach bug, and as we all know, kids in daycare usually get them alot. Well, thursday morning, I woke up to a phone call from my ex husband and he said that my oldest son was throwing up now, and that he was bringing him to childrens hospital to get him checked out. So he brought the kids to the hospital, and they told him that it was a stomach bug in both of the kids, and I went crazy. I lysoled my whole house a million times, I refused to eat the whole day for fear of me getting sick. Then, I was left alone with him all day friday and yesterday. I haven't eaten a real meal in days, I'm scared of every little gurgle or noise in my stomach, I have become ocd about handwashing and cleaning. I am making myself crazy. Last night, I finally got fed up with being hungry and ate some crackers and like 10 pieces of hard candy. Then, I could feel my nerves starting to get bad and once my husband went to sleep, I just sat there almost in a daze, waiting for the food to mess with me. I finally got to the point where my hands were all sweaty, my heart was racing, I felt like I had to poo (but had no cramps, just gurgles), and I was convinced that I was gonna make myself sick. My first response when all of this happened was "oh my god, I'm getting the virus", but in my head, I was thinking that I feel fine minus my nerves and gassy feeling. I should also mention that I started my period three days ago now, so my hormones are all out of wack and my stomach cramps from that anyways. Please help me, because I'm making myself crazy. If I were going to get the stomach bug, I would have already gotten it by now, right? It has been 5 days since my middle son came down with it and 3 since my oldest son got it. I have been in a constant state of panic and anxiety since this started and only seem to calm down when i'm alone, and then I freak out again, because I'm waiting for something to go wrong or for me to feel funny. Every little noise or gurgle I feel in my stomach makes my heart race. What can I do about this? How can I function normally? Please give me some advice. Thank you for reading this.
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...