We have an 8 year-old boy (great nephew who we took in a year ago). He was diagnosed with ADHD and ODD when he was 6 but his mom was not able to properly care for him due to her own mental health issues. He was "feral" for all intensive purposes when he moved in with us: no structure or discipline, no supervision, and intermitent medication (mom was taking it).
Since living with us he has mainstreamed out of special education and been consistently medicated for one year. His behaviors at school improved tremendously and he has been able to function at school with minimal support (he goes to resource teacher for 90 minutes per week). He loves school now.
At home is another issue. His ODD has been out of control the past few months. He has complete meltdowns in the morning and at bedtime. He refuses to get dressed for school yet HATES being late and will throw a fit just thinking about being late. My partner and I are at our wits end. It breaks our hearts to see him completely out of control. We tend to overpower him to stop him from hurting himself and throwing things. We ofter have to dress him, which he hates, and end up yelling at him. We have tried taking priveledges away (no Ipad time, no xbox time, etc.) with little success.
He takes 10 mg of adderall in the morning and 1.5 mgs of Intuniv at night. He was in therapy until last January when he lost services. We have managed to get his medical switched to us and he has recently started therapy again. He has lots of anger because his mom left him.
His bedtime behavior is similar to morning behaviour. No matter how many times I give him "minute" warnings, he acts out when his time is up and claims I never told him. I have to physically take him to his room many nights and put him in bed. I read to him at night (this is a bonding time) and I have to threaten to take that away if he doesn't calm down and get in bed. Every night is a struggle. I am exhausted.
My partner and I are in our 50s; we took in two great-nephews, the 8 year old and his 15 year old brother. The 15 year old has his own issues (depression and anxiety) but he does not have the issues his brother has. We are exhausted and are in need of some kind of support.
Sorry for rambling on. We have just had two very difficult days and we are in tears and at a loss. Thanks for listening.
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