Hi im new here. ive never posted a discussion before sometimes i just come on and read other discussions and it makes me feel better knowing there are other people out there who think like i do. I am 22 years old and have had OCD all my life I guess. I had a horrible episode of it when i was 17 where i just kept thinking that i was dead and that nothing was real. i couldnt think of anything else and was so so depressed and anxious all the time. i just continuosly had panic attacks thinking that i was trapped in this kind of alternate dimension. I still struggle with these thoughts some times but they keep changing. I still keep thinking that im not here and that im about to wake up any moment. everyone i speak to or read about who has OCD has never thought this kind of stuff and it worries me. Ive started to worry now that I was misdiagnosed and actually have schizophrenia and that makes me really anxious and depressed as well. I have just had a son and now cant stop thinking that I am going to hurt him or abuse him in some one and think these awful things like when im chopping food i think im going to stab him. Its so awful. i never want to do that. I get so depressed cos i Just want to live a normal life with my husband and my son and b happy and not think these awful things. Can someone out there help me?
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