i have had ocd from about 9 years old, but when i split up with me ex gf just before i turned 18 i started having intrusive thoughts that i was attracted to kids, i went to see someone about it almost right away because it freaked me out big time but she was nt the right person to be speaking too tbh plus i was still in a bad place after splittin up with my gf, anyway hear i am now and its still here and its sooo bad now, my thoguths keep telling me i like the way i am and i dont wanna get better and start dating girls and living life again its astho i dont want to get better?:| the thoughts dont seem to scare me as much as they used to eaither, everything i try to tell myself the thoughts twist it and its just becoming really becoming so real and scary, as i type this im even telling myself that i want 2 b this person and dont want to get better!! why is this happening? i am constantly assessing myself to see if i get feeling for kids and stuff but nothing ever reassures me and sometimes i even feel as tho i get a feeling, i find it almost impossible right now to feel attracted to girls my age and thats the thing that scares me most! is my mind just totaaly playing against me or what? if anyone has any experiences of this or can relate 2 anythin please comment any help would b good :(
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