To those that have responded to me in the past, I hope I don't sound redundant but I am still struggling. I am still experiencing depression, anxiety, depersonalization symptoms(the feeling that you are watching yourself, like an observer of oneself), and OCD. I am in the midst of getting help as well but my thoughts are so troublesome. I keep having obsessive thoughts of suicide. I ahve had them for over two weeks now. I also obsess about what it would be like and kind of put myself there. It is even more troublesome when I am feeling depersonalized for some reason. During this time it feels like I don't know myself anymore. I just wanted to know if this indeed is my OCD set off by the depression? I know deep down I don't want to do this but it feels so confusing at the time that I just don't know.It has been hell for me since October 07. Before this I felt great. I can't believe my divorce has made me sink this low. I am trying desperately to get better. Are these thoughts and confusion my OCD and not what I really want?
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