I feel so depressed right now. I can't seem to get a grip on how to help my children. I have been having my own issues especially with food and my old eating disorder, but other things too. I feel I can't handle anything to do with me until I get stuff squared away with them. Over and over I have visions of ending up in a mental hospital having to try medicine, which I'm afraid of. I'm afraid my children would be traumatized if I had to do that. I'm scared I'm going to have a major panic attack somewhere and no one will know what's going on and I'll just be colossally embarrassed. I feel OK if I distract myself, but I'm getting tired of figuring out new ways to do that. I feel nauseated.
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