Hi! My name is Maradith. I have dealt with obsessive thoughts off and on for years. This time it is kicking my butt! I had a panic attack about a week ago and I remember thinking "I can't handle this!" and then I remember thinking that since I thought "I can't handle this!" does that mean I am suicidal? More panic! Now the thought won't leave and it is tormenting me! Let me clarify that I don't WANT to kill myself. I have a great life, kids I want to see grow up,and a lot of things I want to do in my life. Maybe I just associated that hopeless feeling with being bad or something. Does anyone else deal with this? How do you deal with it? I am going to see a counselor tomorrow. I am really nervous about talking to her about it because I am afraid she will think I really do want to do this horrible thing. I had a psychiatrist once who made that assumption and put me in the hospital and that didn't help my fears at all, it just reinforced them! I don't want a repeat of that! Any advice on how to bring this across? By the way, I take Celexa, which I have been taking for years. I had tried to cut back on it recently which didn't work =)! I also take Ativan as needed, which helps. I hate to take it though because of the fear that I'll become addicted. Sorry this was so long, but thanks for reading! P.S. No scary stories please! I don't think I could take that just now =)!
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...