Interesting topic. I think many of us are to food as others are to alcohol and drugs. Because we can have our cake and eat it too, makes it more difficult. I think it is just as easy to get consumed by food as an alcoholic does with booze. In fact it may be even more difficult because we have to have food. If I were an alcoholic and tried to conquer the addiction as many times as I have with food, I'd have rejoined AA hundreds of times and I'd still be drinking. I think that is why the protein drink type diets like Optifast help a lot of people, because it takes the guess work out of the equation by not having to deal with food at all. Unfortunately, once the food is reintroduced, the addiction rears it's ugly head and the weight comes back on for most. What we have to remember is that thin feels better than food tastes and keep dealing with the food demons in our heads. And unfortuneatly, I think that will be for a lifetime. I think the positives come when we learn to deal with our addictions caused by emotions and the feeling of satisfaction that we stayed in control and did our exercises. I was offered birthcake today by 3 different people. I said no thank you to all 3. I felt good I did that instead of giving into the addiction of wanting to have 2 pieces with lots of frosting.

I agree totally, but when we conquer the basis of our problem, our triggers etc. we still get to enjoy the flavor, texture, etc. of food.

I realize that the journey to get there is a hard one, but I'm determined to get there! I know my relationship/attitude with/about food must change to succeed, but food isn't the culprit it's the things in us that put it in the position of ruling over us. That's what I'm working on changing:)

Years ago I went to overeaters anonymous and one of the things I remember from them is you can put the tiger in the bottle and never open it again. But we have to open the cage to the tiger three times a day. I hate it that I can't just eat a bit of food and be satisfied. I hate that when I start eating bad food I want more. But, I have to control this and I see your point. I just want to be a good example for my kids and for the people around who are seeing if I am going to succeed or not "this time". It is the hardest thing I have ever done to try to conquer my lust for food but I am trying. I have to take it one day at a time to try. It is just hard. I am scared to try to eat and enjoy it because I know I can't control the amount of the food.

It is so very difficult, but others have done it and so can we, because we are strong and are determined!

I met a sales lady at Dillards and we started talking about weight, she said she had lost 150 lbs. My 10 year old said "No way!" You are too tiny to ever have weighed that much.

She said she did it by eating 6 small meals a day. When she started getting energy from eating healthy she began to exercise.

She found what worked for her and that all we need. If WW is what works for you then you will succeed:) I just started WW last Sat. and so far I really like it. I haven't done it in years, but the last time I did I lost 40 pounds in about 4 months! This time I ordered it online. So I'm trying it on my own and with the help of all of you.

We just have to keep encouraging one another and this helps us to stay focused.

I went to OA meetings for awhile, had a hard go accepting some on the basic concepts but tried to keep an open mind.

Doing the examination of your life history for your personal inventory (looking for charactor flaws and/or things to make amends for) raised some serious issues, things I did not want to deal with, but realized that I really needed to. So I quit going to OA and went into therapy.

I still don't buy that powerless over food - for me, it is not the food that is the problem. It's the internal Munch Master that demands to be fed, but what is really wants is not food. It is like there is something wrong with my brain so instead of telling me what I really need (rest, peace, companionship, to express unexceptable emotion, whatever) it only knows to say feed me.

Maybe I am just describing my own addiction?

Ohh definately, our addiction to food makes us more compassionate to others and makes us see the weak side of most people -at least I am capable of that- but don't you think, and this happens to me, that we are always there for everyone, we make the best friends in the world, we treat everyone so great but we forget to put overselves in the first place as it should be??? I know, it is easier said that done but still it is a thought...

mars and cata, I agree, we do tend to try to quiet that voice in our head...mostly by eating and trying to focus on helping others.

Sometimes, I think maybe, we feel that quiets our own doubts about whether we're a "good" person, or are "worthy". I think we need to really "feel" our emotions and not be afraid of them.

One recent post on another topic the writer said how she "put off" things she wanted to do because of her weight. We allow it to limit us, but it's the voice in our head that's doing it.

I was once told years ago that we should "feel the fear and do it anyway!" Meaning give our fear validation, but don't let it stop us from pursuing personal dreams, goals etc. Maybe by taking little steps we could start. Maybe being here, helping each other it is a start. We usually don't tend to ask for help, but he we are reachin out and doing it:)

I went to a Overcoming Overeating seminar one time and they described our addiction like a triangle. One point is ourself, another point is food and the third point is an emotion. When we don't want to deal with the emotion, whether it is abuse, boredom, anger, etc., we go to the food instead. This way we can concentrate on the food and not the emotion. Once we are done eating the food, we then go to the point where we are. We then spend our energy beating up on ourselves. This prevents us from dealing with the emotion (whether we know what it is right away or not). So we get a new emotion about hating ourself and we get away from that by eating more. So we get caught up in this triangle of eating and beating up on ourselves, never to actually feel and deal with the true emotion. The object of the triangle is to listen to your hunger and if you aren't hungry, then feel the emotion and deal with it. Dealing with it may mean confronting the issue or just journaling about it.

Very good topic! So true what you say lakelady. I can't believe how much journaling has helped me. I have know for years that your are supposed to journal to reflect...whenever I tried to keep a journal...I lost interest..it didn't work. These sites have made journaling work--WHY? typing!! I type much faster than I can write and I would always try writing in a notebook...but it would almost be painful because I couldn't get my thoughts down as fast as they came...and I would get frustrated and annoyed. Now....type...type..type. In addition, I like the feedback I get from others who share similar issues. The other way....it felt like a dead end. Here...a superhighway.

Thanks everyone....Let's make this happen.

I find it easier to be inspired by people who truly are struggling the same way you are...not those people who just want to shed a few pounds (which is their right). I'm 5'3 and I weigh something around 240 lbs...I hate looking at myself in the mirror because all I ever see is flubber the land-locked whale. I don't want this dependence on food, but unfortunately, you need food to live. How can I gain better self control and will power? Any ideas?

Jewels, that is the million dollar question. Anyone that can answer that will be a millionaire!. I heard something once that said the only way change will occur is if it is less painful to change than it is to stay the same. It is scary to change. It is scary to be your own friend when we are so ingrained to hate ourselves. I may be speaking only for myself but I don't think I have ever heard a fat person say...hey, I LOVE the way I look! I can't wait to get fatter and not fit into my clothes. I just cant wait to be laughed at and feel like an elephant in a social situation. So, I think that we have all gotten to a point where we say....ENOUGH. We are through being slaves to food and victims of our own prison and personal hell that we all have. I know I am. I am sick of it! I am sick of not being taken seriously at work or with my family. (Hubby excluded...he loves me no matter what) BUt brothers and sister? They just think I am pathetic and I let them. So. Now it is too painful for me to stay fat and I am doing something about it. I will win this war. I will overcome this and if you are reading this YOU WILL TOO!!!

I think the "journaling" here helps because we get positive feedback. We also get to look at the "weight" issue from other perspectives, as well as the ideas, suggestions, and successes others have.

I believe we have the "power" within us to succeed. We all do, it's just accepting the responsibility of yielding it.

It's so easy to put blame on everyone and everything else. Yes, many things helped us get to this point, but we can change it and if we don't, if we give up then we can only blame ourselves. This site can really help us to succeed because everyone is sooooo supportive!

Whenever we feel like we can't do it just come here as fast as we can and reach out for help, good things come to those who ask:)

I THINK THAT THERE IS A CHEMICAL "BALANCE "OR "IMBALANCE " THAT HELPS US SUCCESSED OR FAIL! DEITING IS A FRAME OF MIND! DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM SAYING?I CANT REALLY EXPLAIN IT GOOD!PERSONALLY, FOR ME, I HAVE BETTER LUCK WHEN I AM FEELING GOOD MENTALLY! BY THAT I MEAN," THAT A FEELING COMES OVER ME" .. IT IS AN UPBEAT, HAPPY FEELING AND SUDDENLY, I'M ABLE TO SAY TO MYSELF "I CAN DO THIS... I CAN SUCCEED"!!!DOES ANYONE KNOW WHAT I MEAN? AND , I THINK THAT WHEN YOU ARE AROUND SOMEONE WHO IS ALSO "UPBEAT AND HAPPY", IT KEEPS YOU GOING! IT HELPS KEEP YOU IN THE " BALANCED" FRAME OF MIND!
GOOD LUCK TO ALL OF US, WHATEVER OUR ENDEAVERS ARE!!!!!!!!!!!BOOMERTOO

langes21, there is a book called "The Path of Least Resistence" it is all about what you are saying.

I didn't read the whole thing as I loaned it out to someone and never got it back, but it mentioned electricity and water are two good examples, they go the route that has the least "in the way." We've conditioned ourselves whether knowingly or not to do the same. Now our weight has become a challenge; mentally, physically, and emotionally. The path that used to be the least resistant now has troubles along the way, that's why we can succeed.

The book talks about making a new path and when it becomes the easier path it will be a part of us. I think that's why some people succeed in weight loss/maintenance because they have made the changes a part of their lifestyle, not a temporary detour.

I like being able to talk to people...especially those that are as caring and thoughtful as you guys are. I really appreciate all of your heartfelt and honest comments! Thank you...now I must remind myself to step away from the doughnut (which I dont even like... -.- )