I agree with you. I don't know how old she is but that can be a heavy job, especially for a little girl. Maybe you should have her over to spend the night and see how she is. Happy?, upset? Just try and talk to her and let her know you love her and care.

oh yeah she is gonna spend the night this thursday actually and she seemed fine tonight but she is always so quiet...She is a big girl(not fat) for a 10 yr old ;) but still its a big job...
thanks
Morgaine

personally i dont agree with the spanking at all... it does not acomplish anything... after having three boys ,,,and watching many other relatives raise their kids as well...i have found over the years watching others that it seems more a way for the parents to relieve their anger..stress..fear..than to teach the child anything worth while...sigh...

not to say that i never spanked mine...grin... yes i did a few times when they were growing up...but quickly learned after a couple of times that it was a pointless excersise... so after a couple of times...i went the route of time outs and loss of privalges and talking to them... rather bore them to death...grin..

but that being said... i grew up in northern ontario...where heating houses was done mostly be wood stoves... most kids were taught at even younger ages than 10 how to carry wood...and are still being taught now how to do that job... but to be spanked because they need to be taught to carry it right???

Yep... sounds a bit messed up to me... makes you wonder what the poor thing has in store for her teenage years...sigh..

bonster is right...just let her know that she has you as a support system..and that you love her....

hugs
heather

Hi Morgaine,

I don't believe in spanking either. I only spanked my son when he was real small twice.
Once he defied me and went in the street and the other was he tried to light the stove.
But like Heather says it does not really work. And it hurt me more than him.
I think a 10yr old girl should not be lifting wood that is way too heavy for her.
But if they have no one to help I guess that's why they are doing it.
But they should just show her
and keep reminding her.
Yes talk to her.

They need to think about The Important things that she needs to learn Not lifting wood. How ridiculous. If I spanked my kids for every little thing omg I would be doing nothing else. and I agree with heather It is most of the time pointless anyway. Why not try letting her learn for herself. or try and teach her in a more positive way. Lots of love kim

You say, "I know they don't abuse my niece." How can you be so sure if they whack the kid because she's not lifting wood correctly. I would be very suspicious and when she spends the night watch to see how she is and try to engage her in conversation about it.

I can't see hitting a child of any age.
Just my opinion and don't want to start a big hoopla over this.

I am gonna talk to my nephew who was there..and a 3 party to the scene. He will tell me the whole story. But my point was, I don't believe they abuse her, and its true, I think theres more to the story than what I heard.Then I will make a decision after I talk to him and my niece. She is a sweet girl andI really don't see or
hear of any aboue and my sisilaw works for CPS. She would never purposely hurt "LuLu" and it could have been blown out
of proportion by my kid and niece. So I amgoing to hear all sides and keep my ears and eyes open. And also let my niece know she can tell me anything, even tho she already does LOL.
I have had so many talks with her, about things she didn't feel comfortable discussing with anyone else. We both started our monthlies at age 9 and needed some one who did. Boys, her mom is kind of ur a litle girl u don't need to think about boys just school and Jesus.
Which should would have had she didn't have those hormones runnig thru her;)
So my niece and I are very close.She loves her mom, very much and her dad.
But we click, and I think thats the way some people are. I feel better now.
I thank you all for your worries and support. I will keep you posted what I find out.By the way my nephew doesn't live with "LuLu" and her mom so his totaly
unbiased ;) and he loves "LuLu" and my daughter very much.
hugz
Morgaine

I'm so sorry to hear that you even have to wonder if there might be some kind of abuse happening. Your neice (and nephew) are lucky to have you there for them.

The one thing that you've said that really strikes me is that your sister works for CPS. I wonder if she would be as understanding of a partent or foster parent who spanked a child, regardless of the reason why.

Children are people too and pain inflicted upon them, even if meant as a way of teaching, is still pain. A parents job is to figure out how to teach without needing to apply pain.

That's what I think anyway, but I don't have kids of my own so I may be speaking out of turn.