Multiple Sclerosis (MS) Support Group
This community is a place where members can discuss current events and weigh in on what's going on in the world.
hi all,
i'm not feeling sorry for myself at all,just sometimes frustrated.i'm in no way bragging,because i think alot of you know what i mean.
i'm 58 had ms 14 1/2 yrs.the person i was is to instinktavely (don't even know if i spelled that right,lol)would be the one to be on top of thing's.i would run if someone needed me.i use to take care (along with my brother) of two sick parent's.my mom for most of her life.my dad as time went on.go to all dr's appt.'s test's,etc.so i keep on top of what would be the best for them.
i took my father-in-law under my wing,because
he eventually got dimensia,harding of the arteries,etc.nobody wanted to help and be there for him.i could never understand that.then when my mother-in-law became sick about 2 1/2 yrs.ago i tried to do the best i could for her.my brother-in-law would take her to dr's in companion chair and i went with my walker because i knew he was in denial.i went in the dr's office to get imfo from dr. it became very difficult for me to keep going.
i even fought with dr's,nurses & nursing homes
and family.they all passed on to a better place.(but i miss them dearly)
please oh please don't feel sorry,i'm trying to make a point.my mind & my instinct is to keep up.the truth is most of the time i can't.i'm afraid i won't be their physically for my son & daughter not to mention my husband.my son will be getting married 5/08 and possibly by daughter a couple yrs.later.i'm alway's there to help verbally and just listen to them.my biggest fear is when and if i'm blessed with grandchildren.believe me on the outside i make a joke.i'll say "hurry up i want grandchildren,
before i'll have to be in one of those seat's with the wheel's on it like the baby or tie a rope to one of my leg & one on the babies."
i keep all of these fear's to myself.if my sense of humor stay's in tact i'll do something even if i look like an idiot.than i can just laugh at myself some more.most all the people i know think i'm a nut and i love to act crazy and have fun.
truthfully that won't change,but either will my inner fear's.thanks for listening.i hope i haven't depressed anyone,that is the last thing i want to do."so i'll keep on keeping on the best i can"lol
i'm not feeling sorry for myself at all,just sometimes frustrated.i'm in no way bragging,because i think alot of you know what i mean.
i'm 58 had ms 14 1/2 yrs.the person i was is to instinktavely (don't even know if i spelled that right,lol)would be the one to be on top of thing's.i would run if someone needed me.i use to take care (along with my brother) of two sick parent's.my mom for most of her life.my dad as time went on.go to all dr's appt.'s test's,etc.so i keep on top of what would be the best for them.
i took my father-in-law under my wing,because
he eventually got dimensia,harding of the arteries,etc.nobody wanted to help and be there for him.i could never understand that.then when my mother-in-law became sick about 2 1/2 yrs.ago i tried to do the best i could for her.my brother-in-law would take her to dr's in companion chair and i went with my walker because i knew he was in denial.i went in the dr's office to get imfo from dr. it became very difficult for me to keep going.
i even fought with dr's,nurses & nursing homes
and family.they all passed on to a better place.(but i miss them dearly)
please oh please don't feel sorry,i'm trying to make a point.my mind & my instinct is to keep up.the truth is most of the time i can't.i'm afraid i won't be their physically for my son & daughter not to mention my husband.my son will be getting married 5/08 and possibly by daughter a couple yrs.later.i'm alway's there to help verbally and just listen to them.my biggest fear is when and if i'm blessed with grandchildren.believe me on the outside i make a joke.i'll say "hurry up i want grandchildren,
before i'll have to be in one of those seat's with the wheel's on it like the baby or tie a rope to one of my leg & one on the babies."
i keep all of these fear's to myself.if my sense of humor stay's in tact i'll do something even if i look like an idiot.than i can just laugh at myself some more.most all the people i know think i'm a nut and i love to act crazy and have fun.
truthfully that won't change,but either will my inner fear's.thanks for listening.i hope i haven't depressed anyone,that is the last thing i want to do."so i'll keep on keeping on the best i can"lol
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A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
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Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...
and grandchildren will grow up knowing you as you are hon,,, not any different.. so they will not expect any different...
For example... my son just graduated from grade 8... his friends for the last 3 years have always seen me with a cane.. they do not even question the cane.. because they have always seen me use it... when i use the wheelchair.. that they question becuase it is new...grin.. i just explain my legs are tired and then listen to them fight over who gets to push me...as i cross my fingers and close my eyes...grin...
So however you are when the grandchildren come along that is how they will know you.. that is how they will accept you.. and any changes that will happen with you they will grow with you along with them...
you know yourself from being a mom that children are the most accepting and versitile beings on earth..
you will be okay... and being there emotionally for your son and daughter is so much more important than being there physcially...and you will be amazed what you can manage from a wheelchair or scooter...grin..
hugs
heather
and now my mom has dementia(I don't think I spelled that right either ;) ) I had to have help caring for her as my own health was declining. My mom really went off the deepend and is now in a elder care facility. I know thats where she needs to be. However I feel guilty about not taking care of her. I take care of my daughter( who helps me in return) my husband(he is a prince) Now they are returning the favors by helping me.
My daughter used to play with my cane and pretend she was a little old lady. My walker she had minimal fun with. Now my wheelchair she loves. However she scares
when she pushes me in it. I am afraid she is going to tip me or run me into something.(heeehee)But whe have our activities we do togather. Read, we collect dolls. We also just talk.
Hugs
Morgaine
I am one of those. 56, out of a job, unemployable; SPMS; dx'd in '98. Any other mud you care to kick in my face while i'm on the ground? Perhaps i can wail 'til you degrade to that point.
momf33: you're doing ok. really.
first i'd like to say to goosetip,don't worry about your response.i understand.i knew when i wrote this post some might and some may not.the reason i said"one of those seat's with wheel's on it" is because my brain can't remember it for the life of me.
i do understand how all of you responded.i have the most blessed nieces and 1 nephew who are amazing.so i do know kid's are resilant (can't spell)
they grew up with me some before ms and some after.they know they can say anything to me about anything.i've always made a joke about different obstacles when i with them and other people.they run to help me with stuff i can't do.i have all the contraption's.
cane,walker,wheelchair & scooter.we have a ball.i'm worse than they are with being nut's.i even raced with one of them on the back of my scooter.they range from ages 8-19 1/2.i don't remember if i mentioned them in my post.
just as an example,we've had wipe cream fight's and made home made pizza.only i hit one of them in the face with the dough and flour and then hit myself in the face.i am so lucky.my brother,sister-in-law and my dumbling's always understand when i can't make it.even tho i know they are dissappointed.that is unconditional love.
my own family know i don't make a big deal out of ms,because i don't.only thing that upset's them is when i get carried away.that happen's often.ya know
what even tho i know i will pay for the thing's i do,i wouldn't change it for anything.
i know i will be the same if i'm blessed with grandchildren.there will be thing's i won't be able to do.although even tho i have a fear of it,if i have them i know i might even try soccer or whatever and have a good laugh.
i should realize it will be with my nieces and nephew,but some how i have
a fear of my grandchildren.i don't know if that makes sense with all that i've said.it's just somehow a different feeling.
i'm so thrilled to hear about how all of you handle it with your families.
take care and thanks for responding.
I've thought ahead to those days as well ... my kids are getting older 22 and almost 20 now.. wont be to far off im sure...
not so much the MS aspect part of it for me... but the epilepsly part of it...
to be able to hold a new born i have to sit on the floor.. that way if i seize i dont have to worry so much as the baby will be on a pillow and i am on the floor.. this worked out great with the next door neighbours baby...
Babysitting... unless i gain seziure controll which does not look like it may be happening... it will be only if my husband is home... but that is okay that can be worked around...
But on the plus side... i did teach my 14 year old how to play poker...grin.. and i have learned that the best way for us to teach them how to fly a kite is in the water...grin.. find a lake and go.. no power lines and if you fall... all is good...
In the end it will all work out for you... you just have to trust in your abilities and those around you... you will make a great grandmother just like you did a mother
hugs
heather
I want to take over the world. My body says to me, "Maybe another day".
I have been in transitition where I am trying to focus energy on things that I can sit and do rather then the physical way.
Slowly, but surely, it is happening.
Maybe you need to try this, too.
heather: another spelling lesson is due...
you are a sweetheart.sound's like you can really relate to me.i didn't realize you had to deal with seizure's.that must be
scary.i'm surprised there's nothing you can take to help you with that.i know our neighbor suffer's with that.if he forget's his med's he has one.i know there's different types.
sound's like you learned already how to start dealing with little one's.that would be me.on a chair probably.the floor would kill me after a few minutes.thank you so much for the nice compliment.i can tell you are a good mom too.
i guess like anything else we learn how to work around our obstacles as best we can. you take care and have a nice 4th.
your friend,diane
and p.s. the floor works great...if you have something to help you up...ie..cane..couch...husband...grin..
have a good holiday..and take care..
hugs
heather
that's funny,you must have ansered to my response right after i wrote it.yeh i know what you mean about the stress factor.have you ever heard of anyone without it.lol
i'm gonna just grab on to what's ever next to me.Hope it's something good!lol
diane