I am totally shutting down and unable to function at times. Nov. 12 will be 13 yrs, together since 17 and diagnosed two months before wedding. He was ok with it but the ms through the years with the medications behavioral problems until I got aware and reevaluated them. He is an attorney and also drinks alot and puts me down and we were at each others last nerve. I left when he lost his job due to drinking, although he will not admit to it. I have received ssd since 2007. He always took great care of me when it came to my MS. Now I am at my parents house trying to get an apartment and no one understands me nor do I seem to be wanted by anyone. The only thing I am holding on to is my child, who is a four legged canine american, she is my world. I am 34 and really do not see a bright future. I am a square peg trying to fit in, but I don't. I am so scared, panicy, depressed, unsure, alone, and just here. I feel very hopeless and I am so young why me. Does anyone else feel this? No one will love me again with me having MS....life is just scary. Just here today.
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??