HI! MY NAME IS CAROLYN. I AM 45 YEARS OLD AND LOST MY MOTHER GOING ON 5 YEARS AGO NOV. 30TH. IT HAS BEEN A HARD ROAD FOR ME, BECAUSE I REALLY DON'T THINK I HAVE TAKEN THE TIME TO GRIEVE. I HAD BEEN GOING THROUGH MAJOR DEPRESSION WHEN SHE PASSED AWAY AND IT WORSENED AFTERWARDS. I HAVE DREAMS ABOUT HER ALL THE TIME. SHE IS ALIVE AND WELL AND LOOKS GREAT! I JUST CAN'T TOUCH HER OR FEEL HER OR SEE HER IN REALITY. I MISS HER SO MUCH. SHE WAS MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WORLD. SHE KNEW JUST WHAT TO SAY AND WHEN TO SAY IT. IF YOU WERE RIGHT ABOUT SOMETHING SHE'D BACK YOU 100% BUT IF YOU WERE WRONG YOU DIDN'T STAND A CHANCE OF GETTING AWAY WITH IT. SHE WOULD CALL YOU ON THE CARPET. WE WOULD SHOP TOGETHER AND GO TO FLEA MARKETS, THEN SHE BECAME REALLY ILL. SHE HAD CONGESTIVE HEART FAILURE, LUPUS, DIABETES, AND KIDNEY FAILURE. SHE WAS ON DIALYSIS FOR 10 YEARS. SHE HAD BEEN SICK FOR 13 YEARS. AFTER SHE DIED I FELT HER LOSS, BUT COULDN'T FIND MYSELF ABLE TO CRY. THE ONLY TIME I CRIED WAS WHEN I FIRST HEARD THE NEWS AND WHEN I SAW THE HEARST. I FELT SO COLD-HEARTED. THANKS FOR THE OPPORTUNITY TO SHARE.
Posts You May Be Interested In
I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
My ENT sent me for more tests last week...one where they had me lie back in a chair, with blacked out goggles on so I couldn't see while they administered water into my ears one at a time ( first warm, then room-tempurature, then cold) while they video taped my eyes and asked me questions to determine how cognizant I was... This test went HORRIBLY. They were about 20 seconds or so into...