My name is Natalie and I'm 30 years old. I just lost my Mother and Best friend. She passed away at age 55 in her sleep of a massive heart attack. We had no clue she had heart problems, neither did she. My Father lay asleep with her til 10am, we found out she passed at 4am. My Mother was the keeper of our family, the light in our lives. With out her now we are all helpless and hopeless. The pain is to much to bare. Going on through these days sometimes feel not worth it. My little brother 21 seen her in her bed that day and has since he has lost his mind, and now is in an inpatient treatment to help him get through this. I have spent most of these pas t two months dealing with him over the phone around the clock. And visits every other weekend. My parents and brother lived at the beach in Delaware (her dream) and reside with out her. The rest of my family is in Maryland. I'm a Navy wife now moving to Va beach this week where I will be alone with just my husband and I. I haven't had anyone really taking care of me. I spend my days home alone, and crying. I just don't know how to handle this and accept she is gone. It's like she just disappeared off the face of the earth in a blink of an eye, over night. I spoke with her Feb8th at 11am, when I got news my friend at work had lost her mother. I called my mom on my lunch hour like I always did and just cried and told her how much I loved her and could imagen if it were me. That night feb 9th at 4am she passed away. I can barley look at photo's. She was my biggest supporter and best friend, we did and planned everything together. With Mothers day coming up it's all I think about, why won't I be able to be with her. I'm dieing inside and feel like a shell of a person. I'm turning cold to my friends and husband. Some days just don't even want to live myself. I'm so lost and empty with out her.
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