
Motherless Daughters Community Group
For any daughter who has lost their mother, whether through Death (if it's been one day ago or 40 years ago) or Abandonment, (i.e.-drug abuse, mental illness, physical or emotional abuse, etc.) and is working through the grief process. This group provides unconditional support and understanding from women who have also lost their Moms and who truly care.

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I'm angry because she left me alone, she died and left me alone with my father which I hate so much. I feel guilty being angry with her but I can't help it, I just feel so abandoned. I feel like she should of tried fighting harder for her life, she was shot on her way home from work. I know it's not her fault that she was shot, but she didn't fight hard enough to stay with me. I just want to know if it's okay for me to be angry with her, that I'm not the only one who's felt this way.
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It sounds like your loss was sudden, unexpected and tragic. Think for a minute that it was the same for your Mom. It could very well have been as much the sudden shock as it has been for you, if she went so quickly, perhaps unable to fight. It's built into a mother's nature to fight for and to get her children.
I don't know the details but forgive me for this trivial analogy. Have you ever seen or been in a car crash -- even a sudden fender-bender? I once watched a car back into the cardoor where I was sitting. I saw it happening, called out to look at what he was doing - but if I'd opened the door (which was feet from his car), I'd have stepped into his car. He didn't hear me, and my Mom (the driver) wasn't in a spot where she could react fast enough. It was like seeing the iceberg hitting the Titanic. You watch it happening - you don't freeze but you're helpless.
It's perhaps the only explanation I can give for your Mom's situation - if she even knew what hit her at all. Your mother was the most unique gift God created - Even the Angels in Heaven can't be a mother. The love a mother has is undescribable. Please believe me - that if your mother could have stayed/saved her life, she would have - for your sake.
Your anger is okay and not uncommon. In time, you will get past it and realize it was the shock and grief of this tragically sudden loss. I wish I could give you a hug a better understanding that might help but in the meantime you have my my prayers that soon you'll overcome this anger - It was NOT your Mom's fault. And you don't know for sure how hard she tried. Just know that she loves you.
In the mean time, don't forget to lean on use during these difficult days.
A huge hug to you.
Marcia
You will find yourself through other emotions and repeat quite a few. It's all normal. Remember, when you feel alone and that no one understands, know WE do. The strength I have felt and support I have been given from this group has helped me a lot and I hope you find that comfort too.
Big hug to you---keep reaching out. Journal, right letters to your mom. Let it out girl. We are here...
xoxo
Jazmine