
Miscarriage Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have experienced the traumatizing event of a miscarriage or a stillbirth. Miscarriage remains one of the most common complication of pregnancy, but that doesn't make it easy to deal with. Join the group and find support in the company of others who know what you're going through.

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why is it when you tell people that you are pregnant everyone is so happy for you? but when like me you lose the baby everyone always says "oh it was probably for the best" and "oh maybe it was meant to be" i got sick of hearing this all i wanted was for someone to put their arms around me and hug me
i found out i was pregnant at 7 wks as i had fertility problems and had been trying for 4 years at 10 weeks i started spotting and went for a scan it was the sadest thing ive ever seen my baby lying at the bottom of the sack with no heartbeat the baby died at 6 weeks so it had died before i had even found out. i was asked what i want to do a d&c, take tablets (in other words a termination) or just go home and deal with it. that was it no sympathy or nothing i phoned my midwife to tell her the receptionist said ok ill take you off her list and i miscarried on the tues after being in labour all monday and losing blood clots all weekend........... and yesterday would of been my babys 1st birthday i have gone through everything alone with no support off anyone i wouldnt wish that on my worst enemy i just feel so lonely all the time if anybody else has gone through this without anyone to put their arms around you i know what you are going through ..........
i found out i was pregnant at 7 wks as i had fertility problems and had been trying for 4 years at 10 weeks i started spotting and went for a scan it was the sadest thing ive ever seen my baby lying at the bottom of the sack with no heartbeat the baby died at 6 weeks so it had died before i had even found out. i was asked what i want to do a d&c, take tablets (in other words a termination) or just go home and deal with it. that was it no sympathy or nothing i phoned my midwife to tell her the receptionist said ok ill take you off her list and i miscarried on the tues after being in labour all monday and losing blood clots all weekend........... and yesterday would of been my babys 1st birthday i have gone through everything alone with no support off anyone i wouldnt wish that on my worst enemy i just feel so lonely all the time if anybody else has gone through this without anyone to put their arms around you i know what you are going through ..........
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What i really hated after the miscarraige to is when They said It just wasn't meant to be or GOD did it for a good reason. Is the reason so we could all suffer with greif.
I totally know what you mean. When you are pregnant, everyone wants to talk to you about the baby! But when you lose it, they may say I'm sorry at first; but then go on like you were never even pregnant in the first place! I hate that! They expect you to just act like it never happened! I lost my baby at 32 weeks, and a lot of people are treating me that way. It is a very lonely grieving process.
Hang in there. We are all here for you and know that this is so heartbreaking. Hugs!
my 1st pregnancy i found out at our 11wk scan that our baby had stopped developing at 5 weeks. the sonographer was really uncaring and jsut said it wasnt a viable pregnancy and we'd get sent for in a few weeks for another scan to make sure it hadnt developed. there was no caring-ness and she was so blunt about it we didnt knwo what was happening. it was our first ever pregnancy and she didnt explain anything to us properly.
my 2nd pregnancy we had to really push for an early scan and everything seemed to be fine. we then had to push for another scan and we found out it had died 2 weeks earlier. she sonographer this time was lovely, she said she was sorry and let us have some time alone while she sorted out an appointment to see a doctor to discuss thinsg further.
i then went to the hospital for a D&C the morning after and the nurses were totally different. i was told not to eat that morning, so i ahdnt eaten since 9pm the night before. i was left alone in the bed all day, my mum foned the ward toa sk what wa shappening and why i wasnt been told anything and the nurse had a go at me asking why i had gotten my mum to have a go at her down the fone. i was then given a pessery behind the cervix (only as i had rememebred it from last time...they ahd forgotten to prescribe me it this time...which cud have caused damage to cervix during d&c) and then left for hours alone, in which time i started bleeding and the nurses didnt seem bothered.it was 10pm before i was taken for the D&C and the night staff were so much nicer than day ones.
sorry for rambling on, i just wanted to let you know that i fet so lonely and abandoned during our 2 MC, your not alone and i think that these sonographers, doctors, nurses, ect shud all think more about the pain that women are going thru during these difficult times, i dont think they realise how hard it is for us.