Maggie, I will pray for you. I don't know if anyone can give you the answer to your question though, my losses were miscarriage and your's is so much more... it's hard I know, my mother lost a little boy to stillbirth and she still don't talk about him, everyone handles things in a different way, let people help you if they offer, cry as much as you need to and talk to God he will listen and give you comfort. as hard as it is to hear know that in time the pain will ease, but do this at your own pace, dont let anyone tell you where you should be in recovery, don't feel bad to have good days and then have bad days again. take care, Tracy

I am so sorry for your loss. I too can understand what it's like to lose a baby as a stillborn. I lost my daughter Grace on March 20 at 17 weeks. When I first got home from the hospital, I had alot of trouble sleeping and I would break down in tears almost all the time. Trust me, I know what you're going through, I've been there myself. I remember the day after I got home from hospital my mother was staying with me, so my bf could go into work for a few hours, she decided to treat me to the Cheesecake factory, and saw a few strollers at the front and had to go sit down because I was crying so hard. Those first few weeks are pretty horrible. You will have good days and not so good days, but the good thing is, the good days will start to outnumber the bad days. I still cry sometimes, and I still can't walk through an infant section of a store, but Grace is my angel and aways will be. That puts me at peace. I hope that helps, please feel free to message or talk whenever you want.

No words can express the sympathy we all feel for you. But this is the place to be. Everyone here knows how you feel. I delivered my boys three weeks ago. The pain will lessen with time. Try to stay busy to keep your mind from wandering back to your loss constantly. Embrase your family and friends, they are there for you. Turn to your faith for guidance. Some women find that a journal helps but I wrote a poem. It helped to provide closure. You are in my prayers.

God blessed us once with our two boys
Your names were Gray and Reed
We prepared for you with clothes and toys
But now our hearts they bleed

This pregnancy we never dreamed
Could bring us so much bliss
As we watched my belly grow
Its roundness your father would kiss

Then one night Reed couldnt wait
It seemed your time had come
A sudden birth was your fate
Your father and I were numb

It was hard to believe
Our one son was gone
I was told not to grieve
The other barely hanging on

A sacrifice for you brother
Though it doesnt seem fair
In the heart of your mother
You should be a pair

To keep Gray safe I laid so still
We prayed for mercy day and night
We fought so hard against Gods will
But in the end we lost the fight

Your tiny fragile fingers and toes
Delicate to my touch
What went wrong no one knows
The pain is just too much

I long to feel you move inside me
Sensations Ill never forget
I do feel fortunate to have held you
Something Ill never regret

I pray my father looks after you
For he is my guardian angel
Every night I ask him to
Ill eternally be grateful

We prayed to God for you three years
Our wish had finally come
But now our eyes are full of tears
For the loss of our two sons

God blessed us once with our two boys
Your names were Gray and Reed
We prepared for you with clothes and toys
But now our hearts they bleed

This pregnancy we never dreamed
Could bring us so much bliss
As we watched my belly grow
Its roundness your father would kiss

Then one night Reed couldnt wait
It seemed your time had come
A sudden birth was your fate
Your father and I were numb

It was hard to believe
Our one son was gone
I was told not to grieve
The other barely hanging on

A sacrifice for you brother
Though it doesnt seem fair
In the heart of your mother
You should be a pair

To keep Gray safe I laid so still
We prayed for mercy day and night
We fought so hard against Gods will
But in the end we lost the fight

Your tiny fragile fingers and toes
Delicate to my touch
What went wrong no one knows
The pain is just too much

I long to feel you move inside me
Sensations Ill never forget
I do feel fortunate to have held you
Something Ill never regret

I pray my father looks after you
For he is my guardian angel
Every night I ask him to
Ill eternally be grateful

We prayed to God for you three years
Our wish had finally come
But now our eyes are full of tears
For the loss of our two sons

sorry for your loss take it slow one day at a time i am going to ask you not tell you how you feel about religion feb 8 1990 i had my angel a little girl 24 weeks she was a stllborn she was my first to i know what your going trough its hard i know im here for you we can talk if you need to your not alone

I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my son at 25 weeks on February 11, 2007. The first two weeks were the worst and so surreal. It's gotten a little better, but it's still hard. I always think about what should be happening now. Though as time goes on the pain isn't quite as raw, though it's always there. I find being at work and staying busy has helped me. I hope you find some peace.

Hi Maggie

I am in the same situation as you. I delivered my precious little girl stillborn in early April. My emotions are so mixed up and I am finding it hard to deal with. As to what helps I would say everyone may be different but I am taking sleeping tablets when I havent had a decent night sleep for a while. I am off and on with the tablets and try not to rely on them too much. I cry most of the time every day and I could be anywhere and just cry at the drop of a hat. My daughter was my first and may be the only one as I have age not on my side. I dont know what my future holds. All I think of is hope my precious daughter and all the beautiful angels are safe and having fun in heaven. I can't wait to see my little girl again, my life seems worthless without her. I send you a big hug because we all need them so much.

I think for the first two months after my daughter was stillborn all I did was cry. I cried everywhere, at home, in the shower, in my car, at Costco (that was embarrassing but I couldn't help it). That was all I could physically do, and it helped. Sleep was out of the question, it just didnt happen. For me it took a few months to be able to sleep through the night.

Something that I found helpful, and still do, is to talking to God. I was so freaking mad at Him at first so I would scream and cry when talking to Him. I told him exactly what was on my mind, because I know He can take it. So yell, scream if you want to. During this time when your heart is so broken and you dont see how you could ever possibly be happy again, it's ok to let it out. It takes time to grieve, and that's what you need to do. But I think mostly talking about your baby and your experience is helpful, at least it is for me. Writing poetry and journaling has been very healing and helpful too.

Then later if you have pictures of him, maybe you could put his baby book together. An idea that another angel mommy here did was make and send out birth announcements. Something like that to honor and remember your baby could be healing for you too. My prayers and thoughts are with all of you who recently had to experience this nightmare.