I lost my baby last week and my sister has just had her baby. I also felt the same as you but when I visited my sister and held her baby, all those feelings went away and I shared my sisters joy.
At a family BBQ this weekend I helped my sister most of the day with her new baby as she has a 2 yr old also, I was happy to help, I was saddened only when relatives and family friends who did not know I was pregnant only a week ago, kept asking "when is it going to be my turn to have a family". This was hard, but holding the new baby was soothing. Good luck.

You know, Saturday evening I stopped by the hospital to take the girls some "goodies." Most of the girls on duty where there when I had my son. Before I went through the double doors I started to shake and I could feel my eyes water up. But I walked in and I passed by the Nursery and saw the sweetest little baby and I was okay. My eyes dried up. I knew I was just going to break down, but I didn't. Maybe it's because I had such a wonderful doctor and group of nurses that made it easier for me when I had my son.

Don't do anything you are uncomfortable doing. Just from my experience, I was okay when I went to the hospital (I lost my son on 11/1/07.) By all means I still cry daily at least once during the day.

I am so very sorry for your loss.

Hey there, I don't feel that you are being selfish. Seeing other pregnant women and babies killed me when I lost my daughter in 2004. Sometimes people understand and sometimes they say, "you're not over this yet?" What!!! Anyway, my conclusion is that you have to do what you feel comfortable with. I knew that I couldn't handle certain situations, therefore I avoided them. Now after my second loss, I kind of know what I can handle and what I can't and I am once again dreading things I don't handle so well. But right now is the time to take care of you and if people don't understand, then that's their problem. My opinion only, of course.

Maybe it is selfish, but I'm going through the same thing. My SIL is so jealous that she got pregnant right after I did, except I lost my baby. She is due in March and I don't think I will able to go to the hospital

I totally understand. My sister is a few weeks ahead of where I should be in my pregnancy. It's so hard! I can't even stand to be around her. I hate watching her belly grow. And to compound the problem I feel bad about feeling bad. Does that make sense? Let me know if you figure it out. Meanwhile, you're in my prayers.