this month (the 28th) it will be 2 years since we lost our baby. I knew something was wrong, but the doctors told me that the pain I was having was normal. i had had two children before hand, and knew it wasn't normal. Two days before I lost Jason, I was in the hospital. They thought that it was my appendix. They knew I had some type of infection. I told them that wasn't it, that it was the baby. They ingored me, and sent me home. I don't understand why they did that. I tried to go to work 2 days later, I left hunched over in pain. I went to my clinic and saw the first ob doctor I could. She took one look at me and sent me back to the hospital. I started to bleed. I didn't know it then, but I was in labor, I was only 17 weeks. They did a cat scan ( I think that's what it was )thinking that it was my appendix again. They kept on pumping me full of morphine. I've never been through so much pain. It didn't help. My water broke. The whole er heard my screams. I lost him. I delivered him in a room outside of the er. He was so small, but still so perfect. The doctor and nurse, god bless them, cleaned him up and put him in a baby blanket so I could hold him. I didn't want to let him go. But They said I needed to have a dnc done. They did find out that I had had an infection, which caused me to lose him. I guess what I want to know, is am I crazy for not being able to let go? Or is it normal?
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...